this post was submitted on 10 Jul 2023
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[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation
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I never understood lurking. How can you just sit back and observe without ever engaging? Do you have no thoughts? Are you embarrassed? Lazy? We will never know because once the lurkers answer, they are no longer lurking. π
As someone who usually lurks on most forums, it's a combination of not really being completely comfortable with the culture and group dynamics of smaller communities, and also just never feel compelled to add something. Usually I just see someone else has said something pretty close to what I was thinking and I just shrug and say "eh, close enough" and move on.
Im often socially awkward around people I don't know well, and I have had many failed attempts to get past it. After a while I usually participate more.
I'm gonna be honest with you, I dislike the attitude of "I never understood sth" followed by confrontational and accusational language. Maybe you did not intend to be hostile, but you're much less likely to get a straight answer with that tone. You're much more likely to trigger "I know, right!?" responses by people already sharing your opinion/impression.
Seems like you already made up your mind about lurkers apparently. Let me tell you why I mostly lurk. I guess this applies to others as well.
Maybe you actually were interested in an honest answer. Here it is.
I hate myself and I'm pretty sure others will too if I let them get to know me.
I lurked after neverrrr getting any activity on posts and comments. I only had like one marginally successful post on reddit
I mean, I'm seeing your name in literally every feed I click on, so that's some dedication!
I'm certainly just lazy, and often people have said what I am wanting to say more effectively than I can