I think the rapture happened a decade ago and this is hell
this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2024
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Purgatory.
Everyone is a sinner. Especially the religious types.
I hope it's during work hour. Would be shame to do whole days work just to get eaten by the rising dead.
Time to paint a new sign, methinks.
Is that why there's an abandoned pair of shorts in the parking deck? And here I thought someone was running around pantless.
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I'm pretty sure my plans are fine. Jesus is going to take one look at us and turn around.
I'm glad it didn't happen because I got to pet a cat while the world was supposed to be ending.
Imagine if what qualified to get raptured were believing in it. The world would be so much better without all those people!
Batting .000 here religious sign guy.
Welp, I have only now seen this post on the 19.09.2024.
I guess I did not only miss the notification, but also the rapture itself.
It's gonna be 10:12pm so we have time for a last meal still if you want before Jesus chucks everyone in the woodchipper. 😊
He's got the wrong date.
To quote late musician Peter Steele:
April 2029, the final time The end my friends is not near, the hour in fact is quite here ... It's a Friday 13th of course you won't live, to see noon. ... Are you paranoid what's on the asteroid has got your name tattooed on it? This stone's called Apophis And it brings apocalypse.
Oh come on! I was gonna get a haircut today.
According to their own book, no man will know the day or the hour IIRC. So anyone who says they know, at all, is by default wrong, and you can guarantee that it won't happen at that time.
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I would get letters from my grandma - long, winding beseeching me to come to the Lord or whatever, with often a specific date predicted in the near future of the end times. I never kept them because I was embarrassed. She was lonely and mentally ill, and probably trying to manipulate people into visiting her, but she also believed the shit she was saying, even though it kept changing, IMO.
I think that's a little bit of what is going on with these signs
ah fuck i missed the rapture again. guys how was it?
Kind of boring actually.
The rapture probably did happen but nobody on earth was worthy.
Jesus came, broke my fridge, and didn’t even leave a note. Asshole.
I think the Rapture was going to be happy before it was to happen.