this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2023
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Asklemmy

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[–] hellothisisdog@yiffit.net 11 points 1 year ago

i'll miss banging you two

[–] LlamaSutra@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The bride gives good head.

[–] kitsuneofinari@yiffit.net 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The groom's head is better. (οΏ’β€ΏοΏ’ )

[–] LlamaSutra@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

Knows what he likes ;)

[–] Thekingoflorda@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Didn't know family could marry!

[–] Lizardonis@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You don't need childporn anymore!

[–] sanguinepar@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Jesus Christ ~~Reddit~~ Lemmy

[–] nei7jc@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Well that's enough r- wait I managed to get off Reddit, I guess that's enough Internet then for today.

[–] Anosyn@feddit.de 5 points 1 year ago

The drinks are NOT free!

[–] dialecticcake@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

You still banned from playgrounds?

[–] dialecticcake@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

{groomsname}, I'm pregnant; it's yours!

[–] AstralWeekends@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A real world one: So, where I live, we speak Dutch (well, Flemish, but who cares). A beer (pint) and a kid (kind) are really close to each other in our language.

The best man in his speech - roughly translated: "take (rape) another kid" (neem nog een kind). He ment to say "take another beer" (neem nog een pint), but the nerves got the best of him.

Was a funny moment :)

[–] Wander@yiffit.net 3 points 1 year ago

Will you marry me, {bridesname}?

[–] thessnake03@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

They share the same grandmother

When I was getting married an aunt decided she'd give us a family tree thing as a gift. She did some geological research, turns out we were third cousins...so that was fun.

The marriage didn't work out buy only cause she cheated on me with a relative of mine...which would also be a relative of hers? Yes we are from a small town, how'd you know?

[–] UpperBroccoli@feddit.de 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Nice polygamy game, Elwood! Nice!

[–] xoggy@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 year ago

That's a convincing sex change.

[–] Martin@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

Killing your ex paid off

[–] nei7jc@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

"you're that guy from the porno!" (That was definitely 5 words don't check)

[–] schnapsidee@feddit.de 2 points 1 year ago

Turns out you are siblings

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 year ago

It was nice knowing you.

[–] dialecticcake@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

He proposed to me first.

I slept with your wife/husband.

[–] fomo_erotic@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

You are not the father!

[–] MinkLitly@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] vis4valentine@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago

This one is great lol

[–] Kyoyeou@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] vis4valentine@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

I tried him, bad choice.

[–] LittleKerr@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Yelling to the groom: custody hearing next week, asshole!

[–] biff@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 year ago

Leave or catch long COVID.

[–] QuietStorm@lemmy.fmhy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

wait you two are siblings?

From the show β€œYou’re the worst” and directed at the bride, something along the lines of: β€œwe have not yet slept together for the last time”

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