this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2024
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ADHD

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A casual community for people with ADHD

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[–] recklessengagement@lemmy.world 137 points 1 month ago (13 children)

Implying you can control or induce these hyperfixations in a productive way is disingenuous at best, measurably harmful at worst.

If you work in a job that can use use the chaos in a productive way that's great, but I'm willing to bet you still face abnormally high difficulty with general life tasks, and consistently struggle to enforce a work/life balance.

You're not helping people with ADHD by posting this. You're establishing an unattainable standard for people that are already doing everything in their power just to get by.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 46 points 1 month ago (10 children)

It's also pretty cringe "mom says I'm a genius" shit

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 26 points 1 month ago (9 children)

Every parent should be gassing their kid up though. Most of our "successful" people are just normal kids that never hit a wall or had help getting around walls. Realistic expectations are what keeps people from jumping jobs for a raise; applying for positions they don't fully qualify for; moving for better job market access; retraining for management roles; and so much more.

Note, I'm not talking about rags to riches, success can be a first generation college graduate getting a professional job; a homeless kid getting a steady job and pulling their family off the streets; a burnt out delivery guy getting a union warehouse job. The point is people with low expectations don't look for new opportunities.

[–] PixelProf@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I agree to an extent, but also that the parents need to take time to understand how to "gas them up" appropriately. It's not everyone's case, but it became very apparent to me when I was young that my parents would cheer me on over anything, and never take any time to learn about the things they were cheering me on over, and that led to disbelieving pretty much any positive feedback from anyone long-term. The only feedback of substance growing up was the very rare negative feedback, because they would only pull it out when they understood it enough to know it needed improving. That, and emphasizing their efforts as the thing to cheer on, not just the end results.

I've learned to work through that, and maybe it goes without saying for most people, but being a genuine and substantive cheerleader is important.

[–] Maggoty@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Yep, kids idolize their parents. So disinterest is devastating.

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