ID: Drawing of a duck billed platypus underwater, they're wearing a rainbow coloured t shirt and a pink bum-bag, and saying: "Ally is not something you can self-identify as, it's a title that you earn. Let your actions speak for themselves!"
Credit: Sophie Labelle
"I have a marginalised sister who I want to support, but a generalised post on the internet that I took as a personal attack (if the shoe fits ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ) hurt my feelings by not prioritising them above her oppression and the oppression of those like her, and didn't make sure to centre me and praise me for my minimal empathy every step of the way, so now I'm not gonna! I'M tHe rEaL vIctiM hEre! sToP oPprEsSiNg mE!!!11" 🙄
You self identified allies just can't fucking help but out yourselves, can you?
That person wants you to tell them what to do. They're looking to you as a leader. Embrace the opportunity to make change by being a good leader who gives clear instructions.
I am not interested in leading anyone, and my life, and the lives of marginalised people in general aren't a fucking educational opportunity. We are not obligated to invest endless time and energy, which we are already deprived of due to having to fight just to exist, to earn that right to exist from those more privileged than us.
If they genuinely want to be good allies, literally all they have to do is open a search engine and start looking through the endless information that already exists out there and start from there, instead of demanding it be spoon fed directly too them by the people directly impacted (and therefore fatigued), especially after they've shown zero initiative or interests in educating themselves.
Okay, do you mind if drag tells them what to do instead?