“Oh look, somebody on drugs left a watermelon on my porch”
People who are up at 3 am underestimate the experiential variety of people on a regular schedule.
this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
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Or do this and save a few bucks.
One day out of the blue, I received a text message, "Dude... I just received my 13lb block of cheese!!"
No idea who sent it. Wasn't even an area code I recognized. But 10 years later, my wife and I still reference it. That one text has taken top-tier residence in my brain, and the person who sent it didn't need to go to the store to buy watermelons or go out at night making deliveries.
Did you at least send "Nice." back? That's an impressive amount of cheese.
I'd just assume it was for somebody else, wrong address, and leave it.
This is sort of relevant if you've got an hour to sit and listen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kNPmTZQySk
Do not do if they are black though.
Probably not the best idea if you are black, either.
With ring cameras, you could become a legend.
Oh god why am I creating an entire super-racist holiday with even more racist traditions in my head
It would only be racist if it was a white guy leaving watermelon gifts on black porches.
If it were a black guy leaving watermelons on black porches, Afro-American solstice fruit Santa. It would become racist again if white people tried to participate by leaving stereotypical black cultural gift offerings akin to milk and cookies for Santa.
or Jewish apparently
And if you leave an axe in it, you'll occupy the whole neighborhood's minds for some time.
For a while a friend of mine would occasionally buy a bunch of muffins from the grocery store, put googly eyes on them, and drive around town leaving ones at random doorsteps.
Aka the HIMYM pineapple on the nightstand
Wasn't there some copypasta about someone leaving a pineapple on their bully's step and driving them mad
That's a How I Met Your Mother plotline