Try not pooping for 3 days. This tricks your body into no longer being constipated
this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2023
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That's what got me constipated in the first place.
Yo, didn't notice it was the same person
This is hilarious
The profile picture is super memorable to me, for some reason.
WHERE'S THE EXPLANATION OF YOUR SIN.
hush
So I'm going to assume the no poop mission was a success.
It sure was. The resulting constipation was hell though.
I managed to force the shit out somehow thanks everyone.
I am happy for your achievement. Well done!
So are we going to get an explanation on the 3 poopless days?
Sorry but I really can't 🥲
I’m utterly convinced at this point this dude is pranking us HARD. 🤣
I don't care if it's real. I laughed so hard when I read the title. I immediately knew who posted it lol
Prune juice, coffee, and any spicy foods.
Thanks a lot imma try them all at once
You joke, but old school nurses do just that: mix prune juice, coffee, and milk of magnesia. They call this combo "The Bomb" lol: https://drslusher.com/constipation-remedy-or-the-bomb/
I'm more inclined to tell you that while I appreciate your commitment to a natural remedy, Miralax (polyethylene glycol powder) is the most effective remedy in my personal experience as a nurse. For what it's worth.
I love these posts. But Imma be pissed off if we find out mizu is Gallowboob or some fucker like that from reddit.
mizu is what
The classic way I know of is a large black coffee and a bran muffin. If you can manage to get stuck in traffic about an hour after you eat, it increases the odds of it working.
So you gave yourself constipation in order to not poop for 3 days... can you tellbus what you were doing now?
I’m so confused on this dudes post history. Intentionally clearing himself out and giving himself constipation but with access to toilets and an air conditioned tent??
This is either the biggest shitpost ever or some kind of evacuation fetish.
Shits crazy.
I'll just say that there's a reason for the old people eating prunes stereotype.
You could try the mathematician's approach and work it out with a pencil!
(but yes, an enema and fibrebare the correct answers
Long walks and much water. Also try eating prunes.
This is the way. Oatmeal or anything with high fiber will help as well.
However prunes or are really where it's at.
Miralax! Works for my toddler. 😂
There is a saying in Spanish that says: "coffee and cigarette, mud doll" xD
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My wife swears by dried apricots. Make sure you are in a well ventilated, prefeably unpopulated space as you are going to produce some gas that will make your eyes water.
Also figs, dates, prunes - anything with a lot of sorbitol or fructans, which have a known laxative effect.
Arby's. Makes Taco Bell shits weak mild in comparison.
Anything with lots of fiber, especially darker leaves like kale. The less cooked, the better. But a warm enema can also help a lot in a dire situation.
The advice is good but also consider going for a hard run. That usually helps me. There is a lot of data to suggest healthy digestion requires regular movement and particularly exercise.
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Psyllium husk.
Not the most pleasant thing to mix with water, but god damn that poopy powder is incredible. It should be part of everyone's daily habit, it's so good for you.
So, did you need a poop knife?
prune juice XD trust me
"It may be used as a dietary supplement to act as a laxative. " /wikipedia
I'm gonna try to find it at the store when I go out. Thanks.
Beer
Xylitol, one of the common substitutes for sugar in sugar-free lollies has a laxative effect, so you might be able to munch on a pack of sugar-free gummies and shotgun it out your backside.
Whether your toilet will be in a usable state afterwards is another story altogether.
Really hot peanuts help, look up your closest Indian grocery store they usually have the nuclear stuff.
The Sage of Mizu continues...
Banana's, cherries, olive oil, plums
Personally, I've found binge drinking to be the most fun way to clear yourself out.
After that, lots of greasy foods will grease up your insides.
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