this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2025
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At the end of the day, Canada is many things. But above all else, we’re a bunch of grudge holding motherfuckers. You’ve taken your shot at us, so now we won’t rest until we get you back.

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[–] surph_ninja@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Then why are y’all letting capitalists destroy your healthcare system? Bring this same energy to domestic threats, too.

[–] Croquette@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

Because all these people are grandstanding. Politicians will do what politicians do best : empty words and things will only get worst and people writing these articles will pat themselves on the back and say they did they part.

COVID has shown us that nothing will change short of a bloody revolution.

[–] qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Only disagreement from me (in California, USA) is that I wouldn't diminish the actions of our neighbors to the north by calling them "petty" in this instance. Nothing petty about standing up to a bully in whatever capacity you can. 🫡

[–] theacharnian@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

We are also known for our self deprecating humour. the Beaverton is like the Canadian Onion.

[–] qjkxbmwvz@startrek.website 1 points 1 day ago

Ah, right, that's why it looked familiar


pretty sure I've seen articles from there posted in one of The Onion communities in lemmy.

[–] Arkouda@lemmy.ca 70 points 2 days ago

Think of us like John Wick (starring Keanu Reeves, one of many great Canadian performers we’ve been kind enough to send your way you ungrateful fucks). We didn’t want a fight. But you killed our dog.

This made my day and made the point perfectly.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 47 points 2 days ago (5 children)

Did americans forget about the time we burned down their Whitehouse?

[–] AlecSadler@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)
[–] prodigalsorcerer@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It's actually by Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie (also Canadian). I don't really know how it got attributed to The Arrogant Worms, but it was probably Napster's fault.

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 day ago

Fixt. Yeah, never shows as anything but Arrogant Worms. I'll stop misattributing it. Thanks for the heads up buddy 👍

[–] flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

For my reply, I would like to link to this Hark! A vagrant comic that will explain exactly how Americans feel about the war of 1812.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Shhh we don't talk about that

[–] flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Because I like you, I went and got you this one, too.

[–] Banana@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 hours ago

But this is just letterkenny

[–] jeff@programming.dev 21 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

As an American that lived in Canada for a few years.

Yes. I mean, first of all it was over 200 years ago. And Americans aren't generally great with history. Second, we don't really think about it as Canadians. I was at least taught it was British troops, which is accurate, but I never really made the connection that it was really Canadians until I lived in Canada and a Canadian made the claim.

Technically it was British troops. The people who burned down the White House sailed from Bermuda and never entered Canada. However, the bulk of the fighting during that war was done by Canadians, and it was Canadians that drove back the American invasion.

[–] 1337@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (2 children)

They have since upgraded the Whitehouse with fire-resistant materials, premise security, and anti-missile systems.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 12 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It's such a shame Canada never saw the need to advance their military technology beyond muskets and smoothbores or they'd be able to do something anyways.

Actually, a bunch of smoothbore cannons would still work, I think.

Do you know how impossible it would be to invade canada? It would be the most damaging war of attrition ever fought. Our population is so spread out, our land border is huge, and we could keep moving around high value targets/waging guerrilla style warfare basically endlessly. Its not like theres many chokepoints or strategic locations that could be very easily held onto. Just look at ukraine and imagine that but way worse. Plus having to defend your own border against people who look and speak just like you and could disappear into your population effortlessly. The resistance would destroy the US and probably end up with them turning on their own population.

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago

Currently we rank 28th of 145 in terms of military strength.

There's some reporting that may or may not be reliable (hence not linked,) saying that there's plans in place to fight against American invasion. Everything I've seen, and the little I've discussed with my friends in the Canadian forces, seems to suggest a quick response to buy time for the majority of our forces to arm and equip themselves, then to fight a guerrilla war. We're under staffed, underfunded (relatively speaking,) but highly trained, and extremely motivated. That's not taking into account the fact that there's a largeish portion of the population who are registered gun owners (roughly 25% national population,) the majority of those being long rifles. A history of an avid hunting culture across the whole country, means likely formation of militia groups doing ambush sniping, and lots of strikes on logistics and infrastructure.
We also have a lot of new citizens and PRs who were active in the Bosnian conflict, fighting for both sides. All this would make invading Canada initially easy, and then a long slow bleed.

But wtf do I know, I've never served, and I'm just a Stone Mason. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.....

[–] Perhapsjustsniffit@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Wonder if the anti missile systems still work if we shut off NORAD first?

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 8 points 1 day ago

I mean, wait a few more weeks...Trump, Musk and D.O.G.E will probably "efficiency" NORAD out of functionality, if not out of existence entirely.

[–] anachronist@midwest.social 0 points 1 day ago

Canadians sure haven't!

And the fact that it was actually British regulars...

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 59 points 2 days ago (3 children)

The only thing missing from this article is highlighting how we're (with Poland's help) responsible for the geneva conventions existing.

Canada is all nice, polite and sweet.

... until we're not.

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 day ago

Geneva ~~Conventions~~ Checklist

[–] But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Canada is all nice and polite and sweet, unless you’re First Nations native, in which case get the fuck in this residential school and learn to be a Christian you savage!

[–] Sturgist@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 day ago

Kill the Savage, save the Man.

Absolutely disgusting, and the repercussions are still being felt. The last federally funded residential school closed in 1997. And systemic racism means anyone of FN heritage is often relegated in the public mind to being drunks, drug addicts and leeches on society. But point to any group of people ripped from their family, raped and abused, had their language and culture beaten out of them, for 200 years...and see if they have no difficulty "integrating with society" no drug or alcohol abuse issues, no self hatred.

[–] IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works 45 points 2 days ago (2 children)

We're polite because we have to be. We started inventing war crimes because we heard a rumour that the Germans may have crucified a guy. Our national sport regards fist fights as a reasonable response to minor infractions. If we weren't polite, we wouldn't be able to have a functioning society. It tends to get softies like Trump confused.

[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 24 points 2 days ago

Kindness often gets mistaken for weakness by bullies

[–] Perhapsjustsniffit@lemmy.ca 25 points 2 days ago (1 children)

He really just needs a good punch in the mouth.

with a curling stone

[–] Yerbouti@sh.itjust.works 45 points 2 days ago (1 children)

As far as I'm concerned I will never trust the US again, and will avoid sending any fucking dime in their economy. Never.

[–] dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de -1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Not that I’m against this idea, I just don’t think we can appreciate how difficult and time consuming it would be to not give them any money. Like you would be spending so much time researching products and even then you can’t be sure that somewhere in the supply chain isn’t American.

[–] nyan@lemmy.cafe 3 points 1 day ago

Well, you can always make a point of buying direct from China. That isn't necessarily better, but it does greatly lessen the chances of Americans in the supply chain.

[–] hedhoncho@lemm.ee 6 points 1 day ago

Don’t mess with nice guys.

[–] Kroxx@lemm.ee 15 points 2 days ago

Good, fuckin hit us where it hurts (money) and show dipshit why you don't start tariff wars.

[–] horse_battery_staple@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

~~Trump te faire encule~~

Trump mon ostie de tache de marde va donc jouer sua ligne jaune une petite heure câlisse de Crisse d’imbécile. Pis crisse nous patience tabarnak.

[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Nice try, this Québécois appreciate the gesture. Now let me help you: Trump mon ostie de tache de marde va donc jouer sua ligne jaune une petite heure câlisse de Crisse d'imbécile. Pis crisse nous patience tabarnak.

[–] lemmyng@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Is it considered cheating if I were to use https://lorembarnak.com/ ?

[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

I don't think it would be cheating, it sa very good use of technology.

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 1 points 1 day ago

So, Canadians are RL Warhammer Fantasy dorfs.

[–] Steve@startrek.website 4 points 1 day ago

Half of us voted for the other old guy, just sayin