this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2023
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It is endlessly frustrating that companies have universally decided that they won't let people say "no" to stuff, ever. There are no longer options to reject stupid-ass new "features", only postponement until next time you open the app/website/program. They'll continue pestering you for the rest of your life. I realize that my frustration may be a little over-zealous, but we deal with these interfaces dozens of times per day and this is user hostile behavior. There isn't really an option to just use another service or program, since the entire technology landscape has been commandeered by a few major corporations, and they all enact the same shitty things as a group.

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[–] jet@hackertalks.com 130 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

You should be pissed off! It's software paternalism, utilizing new speak, removing your vocabulary and agency.

Every time you're given a dark pattern dialogue where it says " would you like this thing that you don't like? Yes absolutely, later " the developers don't respect you, they're trying to say you don't know what you want, they're using propaganda on you..

It's like the classic police interrogation question " is that when you stopped beating your wife?" Yes and no are both traps. So some edgy developer is trying to trap you with oh but you consented (can send it) to seeing this later. When it's really user hostile dark patterns using forced language to remove your agency as a human being. It's fucking scummy

This is why I love open source software, not only is it highly unlikely for you to see a dark pattern, if you do you can fix it!

[–] Jackcooper@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] ArtisinalBS@lemm.ee 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Oh my god! The first organic boneappletea I've seen on lemmy

[–] jet@hackertalks.com 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Guilty as charged! I use voice to text typing on my cell phone. Google does love its bone apple tees

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[–] breakingcups@lemmy.world 100 points 1 year ago (11 children)

Yes, the most egregious one that really grinds my gears is on the front page of YouTube, where it will show a shelf with YouTube shorts with an X top right. If you click it, it will hide the shelf and say "Okay, we'll hide shorts for 30 days" which is something no body would ever mean by pressing that button and it's such patronizing, insidious bullshit.

[–] imperator3733@lemmy.world 41 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I freaking hate Shorts, and the persistence with which YouTube attempts to shove that crap down your throat is absolutely infuriating.

YouTube also recently made the thumbnails larger, which is also really bad as it makes it more difficult to see what videos are in your subscription feed (even moreso with all the shorts clogging it up).

[–] wewbull@feddit.uk 22 points 1 year ago

Apparently it's where the real money is. People doom-scrolling through an endless stream of crap.

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[–] ZephyrXero@lemmy.world 65 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I think another issue here is a side effect of the move to Software As A Service. With installed software you could run an old version nearly forever, but with SASS you're always on the latest version

[–] CaptObvious@literature.cafe 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And this is one of the best reasons to categorically refuse to rent software.

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[–] Sinnerman@kbin.social 61 points 1 year ago (10 children)

Every time I go to the ATM to get cash it shows me an ad for a service and the options are "Yes" and "No thanks."

I am forced to choose one. I am forced to thank them for showing me an ad before they give me my own money.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 32 points 1 year ago (4 children)

It would be nice if there was a "fuck-off forever" button.

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[–] Synthead@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

Change banks

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[–] HappyMeatbag@beehaw.org 58 points 1 year ago (6 children)

No, YouTube. NO. I will NEVER, EVER want YouTube Premium. Stop asking me about it every fucking time I watch a video.

[–] deo@kbin.social 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

You don't want Shorts? Gotcha, we will remind you in 30 days.

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[–] GarytheSnail@programming.dev 14 points 1 year ago (11 children)

YouTube premium is probably the video streaming purchase I get the most use out of lol.

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[–] Grouchy@lemmy.grouchysysadmin.com 58 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (17 children)

I hear your frustration, but there are other options. They won't necessarily be the same, or perhaps equivalent in every way, but they do exist. You don't have to use the same corporations over and over again.

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[–] lvxferre@lemmy.ml 48 points 1 year ago (8 children)

I don't think that you're being overzealous. Far from that - even the phrasing rubs me the wrong way; it conveys "you're something fooling itself that it has a choice. You don't - you aren't a rational human being, you're a user. Do as you're being ordered to. The continued pestering adds "You'll be bossed around until you learn to obey." to the insult.

On a lighter side I agree with Grouchy that you have options. I think that we should start giving those companies the middle finger. And frankly I think that we're better off doing so for other reasons - the data vultures love this sort of "non-confrontational on surface, but bossy upon analysis" discourse.

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[–] TheMusicalFruit@lemmy.world 46 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I just had LinkedIn do this to me this morning. They sent a message trying to get me to buy some sort of sales package, with only preset response options, all were different versions of yes or ask me later. I reported the message as spam.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 year ago

Good! I wish this passive-aggressive shit was illegal.

[–] Hamartiogonic@sopuli.xyz 45 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Start holding a grudge against all companies that don’t deserve your respect. If they clearly violate your trust, that bridge just got instantly burned to ashes, and there are no seconds chances.

[–] Karyoplasma@discuss.tchncs.de 20 points 1 year ago (4 children)

I actively avoid products that get shoved in my face with ads and sponsorships. NordVPN, SkillShare, Brilliant, Raid Shadow Legends, fucking whatever can all go to hell. I wanna watch my videos in peace and they annoy me.

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[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 43 points 1 year ago (10 children)

The tech market slowing after the end of Covid really showed these greedy fucks for who they are. Profits dropped and they all pulled out the enshittification dial for a big old twist.

Like, can't you just deal with being slightly less insanely rich for a few minutes?

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I think it was Vanderbilt who answered the question of "how much money is enough" with "more". Billionaires have a hole in their soul. No amount of money will fill it, but that doesn't stop them from trying.

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[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 36 points 1 year ago (3 children)

In the eighties, it was acknowledged that since the fifties the viewing public are more resistant to commercials and marketing, outpacing their new techniques (more commercials, engaging commercials, obnoxious commercials, product placement, having whole shows that are one big commercial, etc.)

One factor is as marketers hard-sell middle age men, they're also immunizing their kids and grand kids who grow up skeptical of anyone saying anything nice lest they're trying to sell something.

This also likely figures into the attendance crises experienced by religious ministries as old parishioners age out and new ones realize they don't have time for spirit or money for tithes.

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[–] verdigris@lemmy.ml 35 points 1 year ago

This is just one of a hundred reasons to avoid proprietary software. The only power we have to change the behavior of closed software is not using it.

[–] grue@lemmy.ml 33 points 1 year ago

Free Software is the only solution to this in the long run.

[–] FrostyCaveman@lemm.ee 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

2020s big tech web platforms have a certain language to them that makes me think of a passive aggressive Californian dudebro designing them. It’s not “No”, it’s “Maybe later”; it’s not “OK” it’s “Got it” et cetera

[–] SaratogaCx@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

"Got it" is a really weird one too, "Ok" had a hint that you are in approval of what you're seeing. "Got it" is more of a message of "we know you probably don't care or even detest this but you have to tell us you are at least aware of our latest thing".

It is underhanded in the language and has a bit of admission that they know you really just want the modal to just go away.

[–] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 year ago

"Got it" is an acknowledgement while "OK" is an agreement. This is probably a deliberate choice on their part.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 33 points 1 year ago

Yeah, Google is doing this to analytics right now. The decision seems universally disliked amongst professionals.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 year ago (4 children)

It's just like those stupid GDPR cookie popups. They're all different, and I can't think of anyone who would ever want to select some cookies and not others, people either are okay with it or they want none of them, yet few sites offer a "no to all" option, and most push the boundaries of what's allowed under the law.

At least this popup usually isn't there the next time I visit, but there's just so many sites that I keep getting them multiple times a day, so it feels just like what you're talking about.

[–] letraset@feddit.dk 25 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I use Consent-O-Matic to automatically select "Reject all". It's an extension for both Firefox and Chrome, and I highly recommend it.

https://github.com/cavi-au/Consent-O-Matic

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[–] Anticorp@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

and most push the boundaries of what's allowed under the law.

I worked for a company that wanted me to load all of their analytics stuff, which drops a shit ton of cookies, before the GDPR consent. I told them that is illegal in the EU and they said the legal department already approved it. I'm not an attorney or a GDPR expert, but it seemed to me that the big companies have already found loopholes around GDPR to get the data that they want. I don't work there anymore.

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[–] removed_by_admin@feddit.de 26 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Nowadays it's even in cars. When service is due, my car offers me to call service desk to schedule an appointment now or later. To get rid of this message, I need to make the call just to tell the person on the other side that this is a company car, I'm not the owner, and service is being scheduled by the leasing company through other means anyway.

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[–] z3n0x@feddit.de 22 points 1 year ago

"Do you want to try the new Lemmy(TM) Story Experience? Click here or remind us now to keep reminding you until you finally cave to our humungous data-hoovering tentacles, puny little user."

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I've yet to accept Whatsapp's new (2020) terms of service. App still works. So I consider it a small, petty victory for me

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[–] Rene@lemmy.world 21 points 1 year ago (4 children)

My LG television keeps asking to accept terms for voice control. I stand fast in my refusal to accept. There not even an option to say no...sigh..

[–] fedev@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I DNS blocked my LG TV services because I got tired of being served with paid content which I do not want to see but they give no choice to opt-out of. For example the recommended movies and TV shows from Amazon Prime. I don't have Amazon and I don't intend to get it. There should be an option to remove that but you can't. Same with the sports section.

So now the TV works as it should. It can't find the source for that content and just hides it.

Get Pi-hole

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[–] jimrob4@midwest.social 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Microsoft: "Please use Edge!"

Me: "No thanks!"

Microsoft, 6 months later: "Please use Edge!"

Me: "No, thanks."

Microsoft, when I visit Bing: "Please use Edge."

Me: "No. Thanks."

Microsoft, when I open Outlook: "We will be opening links in Edge instead of your default browser. To switch back, go to your preferences."

Me: "Motherfucker, I think we have a difference in viewpoints."

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[–] RoboRay@kbin.social 20 points 1 year ago

The only way to say "no" is to not give them the opportunity to ask the question to begin with.

[–] Gee2oo40@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (5 children)

MS Edge, when I accidentally open it.

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[–] XpeeN@sopuli.xyz 18 points 1 year ago (8 children)

uBO' block elements be like: see you never byee

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[–] InternetUser2012@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Pester me and I'm done with you. I don't care. App quits working because I didn't upgrade it and your reason is "improvements", goodbye.

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[–] Shikadi@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 1 year ago

I've been pissed about this for a decade

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