Every generation needs to adopt new technologies if they want to live in society. For some it was cars, for others it was phones, faxes or the internet. We also stop using older technology... for example, I've never sent a fax in my life. It probably sucks for people who still want to send faxes, but now you scan and email or take a picture and send it via your favourite app. Today you need internet and a phone. It is what it is... like every generation you either keep up or get left behind.
Yes, smartphones can be used to manipulate and spy. You can also use them to learn, to be entertained, to drive to places you had no idea how to reach, keep in touch with people, and so on. I'm not being "controlled" by anyone when I pick my phone and make a video call to a friend or watch a tutorial about something I want to do. You're only focusing on the bad aspects, so it's not a surprise that phones are so evil for you. Plus, some people prefer to have all their tickets, cards, etc, inside an app instead of carrying coins and cards around... it's not bad for everyone.
Regarding China, yes, some countries will be like them. Some won't. There's a lot of stuff that have nothing to do with phones that could have be done by other countries, but haven't because things are different. Governments want to control people, but you probably don't need a permit to travel from one side of your country to the other like they do in China or used to to in the Soviet Union. Maybe I'm being naive, but I don't see why every country must become very controlling surveillance states. It's possible, but there are other possible outcomes too.
I think it's good to be aware about the negative aspects of technology, but to "hate the future" just because it may (or not) be worse than today doesn't make sense to me. I'll deal with the problem when and if it appears.