this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2024
1032 points (96.8% liked)

The Onion

4331 readers
592 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] njm1314@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Must suck to be the person that has to write this every time. Do you think it's one person or do you think they have to take turns?

[–] booly@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 month ago

I imagine it's just a form they fill out with a few fields: city, number of shooters, number of dead, number of wounded. The rest of it stays the same each time.