this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2024
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I just really hate how my friends label me as a child, they are not 100% NT but way less autistic than me, yesterday she admitted they viewed me as a child, at first she stated that she viewed all of her peers as children since she felt she had more lived experience which is fine she can do whatever she wants. but then we met a new friend who she took a liking to and who she views as an adult, and recently on the way home our friend group got to talking about something and I asked something jokingly. She said rather seriously "Sky, there are some things that stay between adults" I reply I am legitimately a year older than you, she then said rather seriously not in any of the ways that matter. In general, there have been plenty of other times I felt like I was treated as a child, and generally, she and others have capped the level of closeness they have with me to protect me, which in practice only creates an environment where I do not have any close friends at all, I legit usually sob to myself in my room when and think about killing myself. I also understand I am a failure by most traditional metrics, no job, no car, no place, I have been trying to get a job for over 8 months, I wrecked my car 6 months ago, but I am not a fucking child.

I regularly feel like people pretend to be interested in what I am saying since I am being viewed a child and most people do not want to be mean to a child, I just feel like such a loser in general and I really hate the fact I am autistic which is 100% why this keeps happening.

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[โ€“] BCOVertigo@lemmy.world 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)

she viewed all of her peers as children since she felt she had more lived experience which is fine

That's not fine. Her lived experience doesn't seem to be translating to maturity at a rate worth bragging about whether the claim is true or not. The foundation of any healthy relationship is respect. I think that whether you want to confront anyone about these events or not, you would benefit from seeking out mutually respectful relationships.

Consider whether her actions can really be caused by a fault of yours if she belittles almost everyone in the same way.

[โ€“] fruitycoder@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago

Having met a lot adults that just cannot handle responsibility I can confirm 100% that not all experience translates into wisdom.

I have also met kids that who have had to unfortunately become very wise very quick in order to meet the demands of their world.

No disagreements with your takes, just expanding on the notion. The friend that is disrespectful is wrong on multiple levels.