this post was submitted on 14 Dec 2024
21 points (100.0% liked)

Off My Chest

875 readers
68 users here now

RULES:


I am looking for mods!


1. The "good" part of our community means we are pro-empathy and anti-harassment. However, we don't intend to make this a "safe space" where everyone has to be a saint. Sh*t happens, and life is messy. That's why we get things off our chests.

2. Bigotry is not allowed. That includes racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and religiophobia. (If you want to vent about religion, that's fine; but religion is not inherently evil.)

3. Frustrated, venting, or angry posts are still welcome.

4. Posts and comments that bait, threaten, or incite harassment are not allowed.

5. If anyone offers mental, medical, or professional advice here, please remember to take it with a grain of salt. Seek out real professionals if needed.

6. Please put NSFW behind NSFW tags.


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I'm 34, and i feel hopeless, ive been in relationships that don't work out and i end up hurting myself, and i find it really hard to find someone who likes the same things as me, and i blame it on my socioeconomic status and my looks. I try to find somewhere to put the blame, but it's obvious that it's me.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] PunkiBas@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I felt like this after the ending of a reeally long relationship, in the end what worked was actually to stop trying so hard.

I came to the conclusion that no relationship lasts forever, and instead of trying so hard to find someone that really gets me, I started caring more about what I wanted and what I enjoyed.

I started seeing relationships more like, well this may work or not, but I'm having fun till now, I'll enjoy it until I stop enjoying it and after that, no hard feelings, it just didn't work and that's fine.

You have to know that you are a whole person by yourself, you don't really need someone else to complete you, or depend on them. You have to learn to love yourself. If you can muster that confidence to manage that, you'll find that people will find you more attractive, no matter your looks.

This is me rn after a 12 year relationship breakup. I have a hot GF now and I equally enjoy just being home alone than with her or friends. It's about me now.