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Well the first thing you gotta do is quit listening to society! Seriously, cut that out. Who cares if you don't conform? There are at least dozens of us who don't, and I'm at the point where I'm ready to take a stand and tell them I'm just as valid as they are. And so are you. Don't let everyone else tell you who you are. Live the way you want to live. And find the other weirdos. Just one friend could make a huge difference.
This used to be my motto at some point before, you know, reality said hello and ended that real quick. That one cares very much about that it seems...
Kinda hard to be yourself or say no to society when your in a position where you have to appease others to not get fucked over in more ways then one, make that tenfold if your society leans conservative (which most of the world does sadly), I don't think I have to explain how society fundamentally works, do I? Unless you got lucky with it, then that checks out, definitely getting that vibe from you. But for me nah, people reaaaallly didn't like that I was different and seemed happy about it at some point, how dare I not be the exact same as everyone else, so they broke me until I couldn't be sane anymore and relentlessly blamed me for it, everything and anything was my fault and my fault alone, no exceptions. Made an example out of me to make sure nothing ever fucking changes here unless it's for the worse. Fun.
Also easier said then done, how tf do you "live the way you want" when you can't afford a home, can't travel, can't rest, can't have any autonomy or agency in your life, can't have any autonomy over your own damn body around others, can't pursue the things you want, can't do half of your hobbies and interests because of money or people being pity pieces of shit and not leaving you be, can't have your own thoughts or feelings or opinions or personality or people WILL launch at you like vultures and tear you down, don't have a soul in your life that even vaguely gives a shit, nowhere to go, no future, abusive shitty family members as the only "welfare" you get, can't do this or that or this or that - and are barely getting by? What? Please explain it to me.
And yeah, it definitely helps, but how exactly do you personally go about that? What's your experience with that? For me irl Is not even an option sadly, and I've had 0 luck online either, not a soul of any form or shape throughout the years, have been alone and lost for as long as I can remember, and my society is as baren as the fucking saharan desert, literally 0 places to socialise or volunteer at, 0 things to do if you aren't stupidly rich or have connections, it sucks, it's only getting worse, this place is hell, and is also very conservative to boot, nobody gives a flying fuck here, everyone is extremely isolationist and already has their established groups, your never finding another weirdo here, you'd need to be someone veeery important or rich for anyone to bother with you socially, and you'll only be greeted by normal people here, nothing else, so it's conform or die all the way.