I'm in my late 20s now and I feel so much despair.
I think a huge factor that shaped my world is my breakup almost 3 years ago. I had dated several people, actually more than several, before then.
I feel like people think I am delusional when I say this, but he was genuinely the nicest person I've ever met in my life. I don't understand how it's possible for someone to have actually cared about me to the extent he did. At times I felt like he actually cared about me more than my own mom did. It wasn't just that, he was intelligent and hilarious too and we had a lot in common.
Unfortunately I wasn't good enough for him and he didn't want to continue the relationship. This basically fundamentally broke me.
I had my share of heartbreaks before, but even when I met him, I was basically at my breaking point with love. I remember telling myself this was my last try (because I was so done). To this day I literally have no idea how I could have so much in common with someone. It's like we completely agreed on almost every aspect in life. Did he just lie to me or agree with everything I said or something?
Apparently he has also had random acquaintances tell him he's a breath of fresh air and so nice to be around compared to most people, so it's not just me.
I really don't know what to do other than cry about losing him. I've tried so hard to find happiness for myself but how could I let something like that go?
My life hasn't gotten any better since then and I honestly think I am hopeless. Genuinely.
Literally everyone pales in comparison to what I had with him. Even though what I had clearly wasn't real, because ultimately he clearly didn't feel the same about me since he chose to leave. It felt real to me, talking to him is the most enjoyable thing I had experienced in my life.
This all sounds extremely sad and pathetic but really what am I supposed to do? I bet most people haven't even come close to meeting someone like him so they can't relate to this at all. I am going to sound insane again but I think he is some prodigy or something. Like one of those one in a million once in a lifetime people that most won't even get the chance to meet.
Well, now he just sounds like a turd. It isn't normal to quantify acts of love and use them as a metric of comparison. You do them because you care about the person. It sounds like he needs to figure himself out before he can have a functioning relationship, and it makes sense that he has commitment issues.
I mean, he did occasionally say turd-like things but everyone has flaws. He also said he wishes I was prettier so he wouldn't have doubts about marrying me lol.
He meant it in the context of telling me I treated him worse than his friends do, and he said that after we got into an argument once. His friends are more like acquaintances and he has never had to live with them.
Honestly I wish I could remember wtf actually happened (apart him constantly trying to leave when there was an issue instead of trying to solve it). That was a common pattern. Like if I would ever communicate to him anything that "bugged" me, he would just be like "do you want me to leave I feel like I'm just making you unhappy" and I would be like "no I do not want you to leave are you insane" but then he would keep mentioning leaving or booking a flight back and eventually I was just like.. I think bro just wants to leave
We had to cohabitate temporarily, somewhat soon after first meeting in person, and I think the learning curve of me being his first gf plus that was just too much for him to handle
Either way it became exhausting after a while being the only person who wanted to make the relationship work
You just listed a bunch of red flags ahaha girl who the fuck says “i wish you were prettier”? Not even in a heated argument… never
He was just being honest and he didn't say it to hurt me he just told me how he was feeling
You know better for sure. I personally don’t know if I would have said it even if it was true.
I mean me neither but like that doesn't make him a bad person or anything