Sorry good Americans, but it's not good enough.

Would it help, Canadians, if an American said he was embarrassed for America right now?

Nope.

Would it count for anything if I pointed out that we were as blindsided as you by Donald Trump’s suggestion of annexing your country, and making it the 51st state? That he didn’t bring up his weird Canada animus until after he’d won the election?

Absolutely not, because if you were blindsided by it, you weren't fucking paying attention!

There is only one thing that would help a little bit: Fix your country. Round up the fascists and lock them away (or murder them, as the US likes doing to prisoners). Reinstate and enshrine protections for marginalized groups and minorities. Bring in universal healthcare. And find some way to make sure that this never happens again.

In short, bring your country into the 21st century.

It'll probably take you a generation to do it, and another generation before the rest of the world trusts you. So when my teenage son is retiring, the US might be invited - provisionally - back to the global table, and asked to behave like an adult.