this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2023
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They'll just write a Murican Bible with guns and pickup trucks.
That is a really, really good fucking idea. We should make a Bible that is adapted to modern American vernacular and interprets some of the stories in insanely biased and hateful ways. You could make a massive amount of money.
Calm down there L Ron Hubbard.
/k
Why bother? No one reads the Bible that we have and the few that do just make the verses say what they want to say.
Ah so this is how the obscenely rich get rich, by not having a conscience.
This combined with failing upwards and having a modest inheritance of millions of dollars.
The book of latter, latter day saints?
murican trinity, God, Trump and the American Spirit
probably taking place in Texas and back when open containers were legal
Don't forget that Jesus is no longer this peace preaching hippie, but mister superstar with real red blood who don't take no shit from no pharisee. Oh, and no more free healings
Reminds me of this, haha
https://youtu.be/mqISX2o0a4A
-Luke 12:51-52
Hmmm
I know, the bible is full of inconsistencies. Weird that the same guy also preached something along the lines of "when someone slaps your face, offer the other cheek" and told one of his apostles (Judas) to distribute the money he collected among the poor. The same hippie that also expelled the merchants from the temple with a whip. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".
And that is "just" the philosophy ones. The biography details are massively different.
Which isn't surprising given that it was all made up by illiterates. Of course they couldn't keep the details straight. Heck I have problems remembering what I had for breakfast last week and Peter was supposed to remember how many imaginary people went to an imaginary tomb and what they saw?
That version sounds a good deal like Mad Max films.
I would expect Trump at some point to "write" a book narrating his struggle in life, an inspirational narration of his hardships, to elevate his followers and supporters.
It would make a nice companion book for this one.
Maybe they'll lock him up and let him work on it undisturbed for a 'few' years.
You know a convicted felon sitting in prison can still run, win, and serve as sitting president
The Byeeeble
Buyble sounds more Murcian
Buyyybull...
In fact, forget the Bible!
Actually, Phyllis Schlafly's kid was trying to crowdsource a "conservative bible" translation back around 2009, claiming that modern translations were done with a "leftist bias" and that several passages were added by "liberal scholars", including the story of the adulteress in John ("let he who is without sin cast the first stone"), and editing any mention of the Pharisees to either "intellectuals" or "the elite" depending on which 'translator' you wanna go with. Oh, they also get rid of Christ's prayer on the cross, because, and I quote, "it implies that Jesus forgives unrepentant people."
That's hilarious. Not sure why they would need to crowdsource it however. As a good Christian scholar dont they already know the biblical languages fluently?