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(lemmy.nz)
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this post was submitted on 02 Sep 2025
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Neurodivergence
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All things neurodivergent and relating to the broader neurodivergent community (and communities).
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For those of us with ADHD, if you are thinking about a task every second you're not doing it and desperately want to do the task more than anything else and are devastated that you can't do it so much that you use all your energy just on trying to make yourself do the thing that you want to do but can't, that is NOT procrastination. That is executive dysfunction. It only seems like procrastination to people who have never experienced executive dysfunction and those who have only ever experienced executive dysfunction.
Procrastination is when you fully have the ability to do something and choose not to do it but to do the thing you prefer doing instead. I hadn't experienced this until very recently, after a lot of therapy and medication.
@Kwakigra @LadyButterfly
Dani Donovan has brilliantly illustrated executive dysfunction you describe. (As it happens, this describes...most of my waking life, actually.)
@cavyherd @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly so much this
@clarkiestar @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly
Right? Like effing daily. Hourly.
We've heard of the modern Prometheus?
This is the modern Sisyphus, except that the rock never reaches the top, & is forever rolling downhill....
@cavyherd @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly you know what? I’m feeling so guilty because I get on at my daughter about her bed-rotting and not dealing with things. The irony
@clarkiestar @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly
My understanding is that ADHD is highly heritable, so if you have it, likely she does, too.
And of course, with "command resistance"(?) layered on top, being told to do/not do something just makes it even harder.
I'm •still• recovering from the trip my mother laid on me about that, 40+ years later. Maybe Dani's image above will provide an entry point for a more productive conversation!
@cavyherd @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly absolutely. It’s actually been the journeys of both of my kids that have helped me come to understand my own neurodivergency
@clarkiestar @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly
I occasionally wonder how my life would be different if my mother had the resources & wisdom available that we do now. I'm 100% sure she meant well, but damn she left me with a lot of damage.
Props to you for doing the work!
@cavyherd @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly that’s very kind you to say. I can see so much of this in both of my parents but it wasn’t an accepted or acceptable thing in their generation. My mum is coming to visit from nz this week, and will be with us for two months. With the knowledge I’ve gained over the last couple of years, it will be really interesting just sitting back and observing!!
@clarkiestar @Kwakigra @LadyButterfly
Yes, that will be fascinating! I hope you report back.