this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
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No Stupid Questions

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I'm not a parent, but going by pop culture, it seems like literally every child has the same fears.

In pre-modern times, I imagine that they'd be sleeping in the same room as the parents, but if modern notions of privacy don't permit that, seems we could at least design an enclosed capsule or something.

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[–] independantiste@sh.itjust.works -2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't have kids, but the way I was raised is by letting me experiment with stuff. My parents would let me bump my head or get my fingers stuck into stuff, because then I would learn to not put my fingers into random stuff. Now of course they told me don't do it but they didn't prevent me from learning from my mistakes. And look at that: I'm not dead yet and I don't run in places with things hanging off the ceiling!

And they also did that for fears, the kid needs to overcome their fears the same way they learn from their mistakes, by doing it themselves.

Kind of unrelated one thing my mom told me she did with me and my brother was for example when we fell off our bicycles, instead of running and crying and acting all shocked and scared, she would just say "Wow! That was a COOL fall! You were so badass with all the dust going everywhere!!" And that would prevent us from crying and making a whole case about it. She told me that kids will cry when they feel like it will bring them attention, especially if they are not badly/truly hurt

[–] Dr_Cog@mander.xyz 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's great that it worked for you, but I won't be doing that with my kids. Statistically, there was always the chance you lose a finger or hand from sticking it where it didn't belong. And while yes, it's unlikely, it doesn't really matter anymore how likely it is once it actually happens.

[–] independantiste@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well I mean they wouldn't let me kill myself or let me lose a part of myself, what I mean is they let me experiment by letting me use a real knife to cut fruit etc, and I did cut my fingers once and I've been very careful ever since, but they would never let me play with the knife so I didn't swallow it for example

[–] angrystego@kbin.social 1 points 1 year ago

I think for some children that's the best way to overcome fear. Not for all children, though, people are built different.