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Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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Element on Matrix is the only one I'm aware of - but it's not the easiest to set up. I would try creating an account on matrix.org's server just temporarily to try it out and see if it fits what you're looking for. I like the decentralized nature of it, but the support is very piecemeal, and onboarding people essentially needs a class.
Ugh, I just got matrix with video working and it took way too long.