Unpopular Opinion
Welcome to the Unpopular Opinion community!
How voting works:
Vote the opposite of the norm.
If you agree that the opinion is unpopular give it an arrow up. If it's something that's widely accepted, give it an arrow down.
Guidelines:
Tag your post, if possible (not required)
- If your post is a "General" unpopular opinion, start the subject with [GENERAL].
- If it is a Lemmy-specific unpopular opinion, start it with [LEMMY].
Rules:
1. NO POLITICS
Politics is everywhere. Let's make this about [general] and [lemmy] - specific topics, and keep politics out of it.
2. Be civil.
Disagreements happen, but that doesnβt provide the right to personally attack others. No racism/sexism/bigotry. Please also refrain from gatekeeping others' opinions.
3. No bots, spam or self-promotion.
Only approved bots, which follow the guidelines for bots set by the instance, are allowed.
4. Shitposts and memes are allowed but...
Only until they prove to be a problem. They can and will be removed at moderator discretion.
5. No trolling.
This shouldn't need an explanation. If your post or comment is made just to get a rise with no real value, it will be removed. You do this too often, you will get a vacation to touch grass, away from this community for 1 or more days. Repeat offenses will result in a perma-ban.
6. Defend your opinion
This is a bit of a mix of rules 4 and 5 to help foster higher quality posts. You are expected to defend your unpopular opinion in the post body. We don't expect a whole manifesto (please, no manifestos), but you should at least provide some details as to why you hold the position you do.
Instance-wide rules always apply. https://legal.lemmy.world/tos/
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I've had a couple female friends who were at one time in "open" relationships. In order to stay with and make their male partner happy, they had to agree to an open relationship. When they did, the inevitable happened. Another man found them attractive and was willing to have an unshared relationship with them. Their current male partners got jealous, and quickly became their former partners. The women went on to have better exclusive relationships. Their former partners complained that they were taken advantage of even though the women never wanted the open relationships in the first place. Even the gay couple - that were open from the very early stages of their relationship - only lasted 5-6 years before finding someone else each wanted to be with more. One of them is still with his 'new' guy. Lost track of his original partner. My takes: 1) unless you know when you are starting a relationship that you want it to be open and put that out there front and center so that the person getting into a relationship with you knows and agrees in advance that it is open, don't try to negotiate it after the fact. 2) isn't an open from the get go relationship just dating and not being exclusive? 3) men think that open relationships are their "fuck around for free" passes and can't believe that their female partners would ever want another man.
Your last sentence is the way I have seen this play out most of the time. Man is restless, wants variety. Says "let's try open" Cannot find a date but wife has multiple choices of dates. Husband gets mad because wife is living the life he wanted and even if it makes her more into her husband, he doesn't see that benefit, it's not what he was after.