this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2026
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Gen Z is living in an intimacy economy, where connection is commodified (www.theguardian.com)
submitted 3 days ago by arbilp3@aussie.zone to c/australia@aussie.zone
18 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

cross-posted from: https://aussie.zone/post/35023765

Leading AI researchers now expect artificial general intelligence (AGI) – where AI meets or exceeds human intellectual capabilities – within three to five years. When AGI automates thinking, the economy will need to reorganise around what machines cannot do: feel.

We are already in the intimacy economy. But if we are to thrive within it, we must wrestle back our most valuable economic asset from technology: the messy complexities of being human. My generation are the begrudging harbingers of what will happen if we continue to outsource intimacy: we will lose the emotional skills a post-AGI economy will depend on most, rendering us unemployable. We knew social media was addictive and slowing our cognitive development, but officials took until this year to act. We can’t make the same mistake with the intimacy economy.

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[–] Ilandar@lemmy.today 9 points 3 days ago (3 children)

It's kind of bizarre to me that AI has been reported about constantly for years and yet so many people are still using it for shit like this. Will they ever wake up and join the rest of us back in reality? They don't have a new friend, they aren't in a relationship, they're not talking to anyone; they are more alone than they've ever been and need an intervention immediately.

[–] Ediacarium@feddit.org 8 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I don't think it's that easy to just 'wake up'. To 'wake up' you'd need to have eligible people nearby, invest countless hours into them and be able to meet them somewhere.

And it's hard, because AI is to friendships what porn is to intimacy.
It's good enough, doesn't ask for anything and you can both hide it easily and use it anywhere.

Most people, I think, would gladly 'wake up' if someone from the outside would shoulder the risk and invest the time and effort into them to get to know them.
But instead, it's just easier for one side to tell them how horrible that behavior is and for others to search for someone, who is willing to add a little effort themselves.

So, I think, it's more a societal problem, that so many young people fall into using easy substitutions for friendships and relationships, instead of the infinitely better real thing. And then the question becomes: How has society changed for young people and how can we help them and keep them from falling into the trap?

[–] Ilandar@lemmy.today 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Most people, I think, would gladly 'wake up' if someone from the outside would shoulder the risk and invest the time and effort into them to get to know them.

This is the problem, though. The expectation is that someone else is going to come in and save them. If you are a loser with no friends, no one is going to want to be your friend. That's just reality, no one is owed friendship or social interaction.

If you talk to people who have pulled themselves out of holes (addiction, loneliness, etc) they are usually pretty clear that the first person to blame was themselves and they are willing to accept responsibility for that. This is what gives them the agency to do something about it.

None of this is to say that the macro solutions should be ignored. It's just the wrong attitude to focus only on these and ignore the micro, which we have direct control over as individuals. We as a broader society have responsibility for solving macro problems, but as individuals we need fo be accountable for our own lives.

EDIT: By the way, I think your comparison to porn is a good one in terms of the fulfilment of some kind of instinctual human need. Going back to my initial comment, the difference is that people with porn addictions who sit around jorking it all day are still keenly aware that they're not actually having sex.

The people who think they have a chatbot friend who "understands them like no one else" have completely lost touch with reality, though. This is the bit I find difficult to understand, because at this point I feel like most people should know the basics of how this technology works and understand that what they're saying is happening is impossible.

[–] Ediacarium@feddit.org 3 points 2 days ago

If you talk to people who have pulled themselves out of holes (addiction, loneliness, etc) they are usually pretty clear that the first person to blame was themselves and they are willing to accept responsibility for that. This is what gives them the agency to do something about it.

There is some truth in that, but I think that people who have pulled themselves out, have done a lot of work outside of treating the addiction part of the addiction, because imo addictions are mostly crutches.

Sure, there is the addiction part, but addictions often start as a replacement for something else you're missing. Be it alcohol being a replacement for a way to unwind after work, porn for missing intimacy and social media/AI replacing a social life/a good friend.

So, those people will often have to fix what is missing in their life and then they will be able to let go of the addiction. This is also the reason why addiction treatment facilities don't work. You basically take a vacation, all your needs are fulfilled and you don't need your addiction as a crutch anymore. You're healed.

Then you get dropped into your regular life and fall back into the addiction, because you never learned the tools to change your current life into a more fulfilling one and the cycle repeats.

The people who think they have a chatbot friend who "understands them like no one else" have completely lost touch with reality, though. This is the bit I find difficult to understand, because at this point I feel like most people should know the basics of how this technology works and understand that what they're saying is happening is impossible.

Oh, I think, people are able to hold contradicting believes, if they need it, but I don't think people are stupid. I think those people have, probably for the first time in their life, encountered something friend-shaped, that responds with understanding and empathy, instead of punishment, rejection and anger.

So it's not that they're being understood for the first time. They're just used to getting negative feedback as a form of understanding. Suddenly getting positive feedback feels like 'understanding me like no one else', because it is.

Someone that was pushed by their parents to be something special, will only feel that they're worth of love by being special. And an AI will accept them as they are, because the AI kinda has to. And they become dependent on the validation of the AI, they just need to find a reason to justify it to themselves.

[–] arbilp3@aussie.zone 3 points 3 days ago

Another great response. Learning a lot from you both. 🩷

[–] arbilp3@aussie.zone 2 points 3 days ago

Really well put. 🩷

[–] arbilp3@aussie.zone 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's not just 'they' that need an intervention, imo. Vulnerable people need to be shown that people can be relied upon.

I also think that we need to support youth from primary school onwards to develop insight, emotional intelligence and interpersonal skills in real-life situations and to learn about this AI minefield, otherwise, mental health problems are going to keep increasing.

[–] Ilandar@lemmy.today 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yes, unfortunately Gen Z has gone from being the forgotten generation as children with social media straight into generative AI chatbots as adults. Regulation is too slow and ineffective due to the archaic nature of our institutions. That's part of the reason I feel so strongly about individual responsibility, because unfortunately no one is coming to save these young people (or any of us, really).

[–] arbilp3@aussie.zone 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Shouldn't we be there to save each other? Those of us who are older or more experienced and who care about what is happening to the young, we are accountable.

We cannot expect them all to be responsible if we have not supported their growth as individuals who are valued. Many young people don't necessarily have perfect role models around them. None of us are perfect but we are sharing a society and we can be 'there' and not just say it's up to the individual, especially if the individual has not had enough experience of person to person ommunication.

I'm not discounting what you are saying. This is an enormous challenge.

[–] Ilandar@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

We already are, there are support systems (professional and voluntary) that exist to help those who are willing to ask for it. No one can force them to take that first step, though, that's something that is ultimately up to them. It starts with admitting to yourself that you have a problem, which is something these people convincing themselves they are in relationships with chatbots are sadly not doing.

[–] arbilp3@aussie.zone 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Then more work needs to be done online imo, among Gen Z, to make the discussion of this topic go viral so that it gets to as many people as possible.

If you know the names of the support systems you mention, could you provide them please so we can pass the word around.

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 1 points 3 days ago

yeah I don't get emotional attachment with programs. I mean its not even the matrix.