this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2026
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No Stupid Questions

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No such thing. Ask away!

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Edit: My own solution: when it happens, get off the computer and pet the dog.


So let's say I make a point on a post. I put forward my argument and I support it with evidence.

Now let's say the first comment is from someone who disagrees with me, but seems to fundamentally misunderstand what I am saying, probably because they read the title of the post and immediately posted the first thing that came to mind.

But my fear, acquired from Reddit, is that people are going to read this guy's totally inaccurate presentation of my argument and then every comment in the rest of the discussion will proceed as if that's what I said.

And since, as we all know, fear leads to hate, my first instinct is just to berate this person for being a stupid moron.

This is a bad strategy. Not only is probably against Lemmy rules, it automatically makes me the bad guy.

So: question: how do I handle this person without tediously restating my position again, which is extremely irritating because I already wrote it once and they didn't read it the first time. What I want is to say something that quickly quarantines the misreading comment in people's minds so the misreading doesn't infect the entire thread.

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[–] mirshafie@europe.pub 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

You made a weird connection to autism that was unrelated to the post. You were asked to clarify the connection, and gave the example that "neurotypicals" rely on "unclear" communication. It's unclear how that's relevant. You did not provide evidence or clarification, and now you're being an asshole.

[–] Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Thanks (honestly) for clearing that up.

See - that's the issue. There is this inherent obvious connection on the op topic that you can't see. And that's fine, you're NT. However I am not, hence you're saying I am an asshole for not elaborating a point you can not understand. It's literally beyond NT understanding.

As is many understanding of yours to ND. And when trying to go into this, I, or rather, we are the assholes. So of course we resign. There is this gap in understanding that I even linked and it's still not enough.

So, there you go. I am sure it will not or never be enough. It's just that on the opposite side you as a standin for NT are behaving like assholes, but both sides are literally incapable of getting some points across.

As said, still thanks for your answer. Be kind to people, you might not understand them. (unrelated to me)

Edit oh by the way: weird is the perfect notice of autism by NT. Just FYI

[–] mirshafie@europe.pub 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

If there is an obvious connection, it should be simple enough to explain it. If the assumption is that misunderstandings happen due to variances in brain wiring, I think that's a sidenote rather than the generic explanation fot the phenomenon OP described. What OP tried to say is that misunderstandings happen due to biases - and we all have biases - and they wanted to shut down misunderstandings politely before it derails the thread.

The issue I'm taking is that you're claiming something and it's unclear what, saying that whatever it is must remain mysterious because of differences in brain wiring, because you're autistic. Meanwhile, OP is autistic and so am I. We're all fucking autistic. The irony is that this is derailing the thread.

[–] Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

For me and some others it's obvious, for you it's not. I got that and apologized to op.

Yeah OK we're all autists. We'll done.