this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2026
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No Stupid Questions

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No such thing. Ask away!

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Edit: My own solution: when it happens, get off the computer and pet the dog.


So let's say I make a point on a post. I put forward my argument and I support it with evidence.

Now let's say the first comment is from someone who disagrees with me, but seems to fundamentally misunderstand what I am saying, probably because they read the title of the post and immediately posted the first thing that came to mind.

But my fear, acquired from Reddit, is that people are going to read this guy's totally inaccurate presentation of my argument and then every comment in the rest of the discussion will proceed as if that's what I said.

And since, as we all know, fear leads to hate, my first instinct is just to berate this person for being a stupid moron.

This is a bad strategy. Not only is probably against Lemmy rules, it automatically makes me the bad guy.

So: question: how do I handle this person without tediously restating my position again, which is extremely irritating because I already wrote it once and they didn't read it the first time. What I want is to say something that quickly quarantines the misreading comment in people's minds so the misreading doesn't infect the entire thread.

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[–] schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No worries. I discovered the autism lemmy and think I have broad phenotype autism, so I'm always interested in learning more.

I worked at a tech place and got along with everyone there. I thought it meant I was likable and it just different places are going to have different vibes, but someone pointed out tech people tend towards autism, so maybe all that was happening was that I find myself with a group of people who naturally shared my communication style... and that, basically still, I'm unlikable.

[–] Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Not unlikable, that's important. You be yourself. Masking will put a heavy strain on you, find your people.

We don't get much external positive reinforcement so the negative tends to stick and impact our self esteem, it's a negative loop.

[–] schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Oh, hey, Strider. I'm the guy you had an imaginary confrontation with in a thread yesterday. We were talking about autism. I thought I'd find you here!

Yeah, my problem is that I'm not finding my people anywhere, and I'm getting old. I'm thinking I need to explore Mastodon and MakerTube, because I'm not finding people in meatspace and not even really on-line either.

[–] Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

Haha, touche I think. I'm confused as always (and my lemmy client even added to this now since the comment was too deep.. Lol).

Yeah, same boat here with the difference is the last attempt burned me further and meatspace... Well, you know how it goes when leaving the house alone is too much of a strain nevermind meeting and interacting with people.