I haaaate how people dismiss those of us who have less visible struggles. In particular, it upsets me the way intelligent autistic kids are expected to have all their shit together, just because they talk like little professors. Intelligence and emotional maturity are two completely different things. A little kid can be brighter than all the adults around them, but that doesn't mean they can regulate themselves like a neurotypical adult can.

No wonder so many of us grow up to feel like imposters - ever since childhood, other people put high expectations on us based on one aspect, then get upset at us when we fail to master everything. I've worked with kids of this type as well, and it's disappointing how many times I've heard coworkers go, "They're so smart! Why are they even here (at a school specifically for autistic kids with behavior issues)?" Short answer: because there's a lot more to school-readiness than wanting to learn. Lacking the social skills to tolerate classmates, and having those situations trigger behaviors that can cause injury to themselves and others, is not conductive to a traditional school environment.

I had to raw-dog that experience in my own childhood in the 90s, when few people would've expected a little girl to be autistic (let alone a bright girl who loved rambling about science.) I had to learn socialization the hard way, after years of screaming, crying, throwing chairs, getting detention, and the only help I ever got was being told to "just ignore" my bullies. Thank goodness there are more services and knowledge available today to help such kids. Unfortunately, we still have quite a ways to go toward having "invisible" disabilities be understood and accepted, even by those who specialize in working with such individuals. Sigh...