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What terrifies men the most about homosexuality?
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I understand you think it's wrong, but that's because you're looking at this through a different lens.
Here's what i take from it:
In casual communicative contexts, phrasing something as a question doesn't necessarily mean it's seeking an answer or at least not one that solves a problem. So, this can't be a pointless discussion, because it isn't a discussion at all, and certainly not an academic one. It's people sharing experiences, just a conversation. it's great you want more rigor, but asking for it here as if it were obvious misses the point: this wasn't a context that demanded rigor from the start.
You don’t get that this is the worst type of approach to this situation. You want to understand through ignorance be my guest. You wont find your answer. But, these people are the same as the people they think are “afraid” just two ignorant fools.