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this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2026
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You absolutely must give out full size candy bars. What happens if Death visits?
I instead buy many pounds of bulk wrapped candy from nuts.com (or any other place) and then hand scoops of candy out.
The kids love having a 2 cup scoop of candy poured in their bag.
Until they realize you just gave them 2 cups of dog food.
Yeah but I spend a lot of time eating candy and then wrapping the dog food with the candy-wrappers, so … they should appreciate the effort I’ve gone to
We often buy too much candy. When we realize we did, we usually have a soulful moment where we need to decide how much candy we're keeping for ourselves. Yes, we can buy candy anytime but we're adults so we usually don't buy bags of little sugar pucks.
After we've broken our hearts taking more than we need and less than we want, we usually try to wait until it's the last kid of the night who's old enough to understand but young enough to be utterly bombastically awestruck and dump some preposterous amount of candy in their bag after doing a quick non-verbal "you cool with this happening?" Negotiation with their parent.
I definitely haven’t already eaten 3 pounds of salt water taffy ahead of Halloween.
I’ll need to re-up, my planning ahead works against me