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Advice on helping a loved one through alcoholism? (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 year ago by Flickerby@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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My fiance has been struggling a lot lately with this and it's taking a toll on me. I'm doing all I can and all I know how to do but it's getting really hard and exhausting to deal with the constant cycle of abuse and then apology and then abuse and then apology over and over and over again for months. Usually day by day. I have convinced her to go to a counselor for help and she has an appointment set and seemed willing but she has kept up the cycle of drinking and I'm afraid she'll just ignore it or pretend to go. If anyone has experience helping a loved one through overcome this I would appreciate the help. She is an absolutely wonderful person when she is sober and I love her with all my heart but I'm not sure what else I can do and I don't want the rest of my life to consist of this.

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[–] Skunk@jlai.lu 15 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

This book This Naked Mind helped me a lot to quit alcohol.

But it was my own decision, not coming from someone else.

Sadly, the stop drinking community on Lemmy is non existent or dead so you have to check the original r/stopdrinking on Reddit. Even if we left that place, this sub is just awesome, packed with useful resources and is something really hard to find elsewhere, you won't even have to post, just start by reading the sidebar and wiki.

Good luck, my problem with alcohol cost me my 13 years marriage but I got out of it mostly thanks to that subreddit, so anything is possible.

[–] Flickerby@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah I've tried directing her to the /stopdrinking community but she doesn't want to do that. She's had some bad experiences with people online. And I guess people in general. She does like to read though, maybe if it's a book she'd be more open to it, thank you

[–] Skunk@jlai.lu 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah my idea was not to send her on Reddit but send you there so you could find good resources and maybe ask the same question if you feel like it.

I hope you will find some good reading material there that you can gift her (and she will love to read).

[–] Flickerby@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Oh duh, thank you, I can't believe I didn't think of that myself sooner. Yeah maybe I'll go there too. Though I haven't even opened that since they killed RiF

[–] Skunk@jlai.lu 11 points 1 year ago

I feel you, I still have Apollo installed on my phone…