this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2023
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/r/menslib
It became a god damn misogynist shit show.
It's very hard finding men's spaces that don't quickly devolve into anti-feminism and general misogyny.
Why does anyone need a 'men's space'? I'm a man but I just would not be interested in that specifically. This is the Internet and there's a space for everything specifically. Sounds like a 'men's space' or a 'women's space' are bound to be filled with intolerance for the other genders.
I don't disagree that gendered spaces are primed to end up displaying a modicum of prejudice against the other, but I don't agree that this must necessarily be the case.
There are genuine issues facing men that I think we should be allowed and even encouraged to discuss, and I think it's important that such conversations are had with other men in particular to reduce the stigma surrounding them. So in my mind the goal of such a space isn't to discourage women from participating, but localizing the discussion so that it's easier for men to find.
The unfortunate truth is that too many men these days seem to think feminism is out to oppress them, which simply isn't the case.
Sometimes people want to talk about their shit with people who can directly relate to it, and would prefer if people who can't relate aren't invited to the conversation.
There is a gap between "I'm not interested" and "I refuse to understand why someone else would be interested" that's not really acknowledged here but is important to be able to engage with.
It made me so sad. I really enjoyed it early on because they had some real critical self reflection.
How?