this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2024
856 points (90.5% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26897 readers
2544 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Gork@lemm.ee 151 points 9 months ago (3 children)

As an American, I cannot legally touch any egg that hasn't been ultra-pasteurized followed by continuous cold chain refrigeration and served in either a Styrofoam or pulped paper cardboard egg carton.

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 43 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I think you have been misinformed. As an American, I can harvest eggs just like the pictured ones from my own backyard on a regular basis.

They don't even cost any money, they come out of chicken asses for free.

[–] joel_feila@lemmy.world 35 points 9 months ago (2 children)

You must have weird chickens. My lay eggs out if their cloaca.

[–] thegoodyinthehoody@sh.itjust.works 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Isn’t their asshole like inside the cloaca?

[–] joel_feila@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Their colon is. The coloaca is their asshole, and pee hole, and egg hole.

[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago (2 children)

What a noob. Ours come from shops. That way, our entire fuckin garden doesn't smell like a crashed ammonia tanker

[–] BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 13 points 9 months ago

As a side note, if your chicken coop smells like a crashed ammonia tanker you need to add more carbon in the coop. Dead leaves, cardboard, shredded wood or wood chips are working well.

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Sorry your yard is so small. Mine is large enough that the chicken coop is far away from the house and is usually not a bother. Summertime when the wind is just wrong can be an annoying stench, but it's almost nothing compared to the smell of dumpsters in a big city during summer heat.

[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 24 points 9 months ago (1 children)

We call our yards "metres" and they're a little bit bigger than yours

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world -5 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Off topic pedantry, great response

[–] Muehe@lemmy.ml 15 points 9 months ago

Sir, this is a ~~Wendy's~~ shitpost community.

[–] AnxiousOtter@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You have no idea how big I can live. What if I told you that I knew a guy who can turn you into a walrus?

[–] AnxiousOtter@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

I'd say pass whatever you've got, I'll take a snort.

[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This instantly reminded me of an old Mitchell and Webb sketch lol

[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 9 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Mitchell and Webb

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] JJROKCZ@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

Let’s not pretend the acquisition and upkeep of chickens is free… if you eat a lot of eggs it is absolutely worth it, but there is some cost in setting up a coop, getting chickens, keeping chickens fed and safe from predators, disease, etc.

Plus you have to have property to keep them on and be allowed to have them on your property. For most Americans that isn’t possible due to lack of home ownership or HOA restrictions on what animals you can have on “your” property. (HOAs are bullshit)

[–] Gladaed@feddit.de 34 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This is pulped paper cardboard, is it not?

[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 44 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] Gandarf@startrek.website 30 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's so nice of you to gift it to them!

[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 19 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I just noticed the mistake and I knew one of you smart asses was going to call me out before I message to fix it :(

[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 23 points 9 months ago (2 children)

You message to fix it? What, you have staff to do it for you?

[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I don't even know how the fuck that happened. I give up.

[–] Duranie@literature.cafe 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] EdibleFriend@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago
[–] Alk@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

Except the ones with girlfriends called Ruth, obv

[–] Gandarf@startrek.website 3 points 9 months ago

Hah, jokes on you. I'm a DUMBass. :p

[–] Milk_Sheikh@lemm.ee 6 points 9 months ago

“Y’all’s eggs AREN'T chlorine washed? Ewww unsanitary”