Well, we know where you stopped reading.

No. Obviously, as I stated later in my post, I refrain from using words that are taken as offensive in an effort to make my fellow humans more comfortable. I personally don't have any issue with any word. I refuse to allow someone to have that much control over my emotional state by using a word.

I don't understand why anyone would want to give someone else control over their person simply because they're an ignorant bigot who has no issue using such a word in an offensive way.

I do my best to give all of my fellow people (friends, co-workers and even strangers) respect. At least enough respect not to stoop to simple character attacks using historically demeaning language. If I have a problem with someone, that shouldn't imply that they are somehow less than me, they are simply the center point of the issue I'm having, and I shouldn't resort to trying to insult them based on something as trivial as their race, culture, religion, creed, or anything else that's so generalized.

It reminds me of the xkcd comic about double standards: in the first pane it shows two people, presumably men, both standing at a blackboard or similar doing math, and the first is saying to the second "wow, you suck at math". In the second pane, it's presumably a man and a woman in the exact same scenario, but in this case, the man is saying to the woman "wow, women suck at math".

The difference is clear: in the first scenario, they're addressing the individual, in the second, they're referring to an entire group based on a single characteristic of that individual. That kind of broad generalization of an individual based on a single factor, whether it is race, gender, religion, etc... Is the core of the issue for me. If I have an issue with someone, or even multiple someone's of a particular race, gender, class, etc... I make active efforts to not make judgements of all people of that particular race/gender/whatever, based on this small sample.

I've had friends of various races, gender identities, religions, etc, who are very rational, intelligent, good natured, etc. I've also known people of pretty much every class, gender, race, religion, etc, who are utterly infuriating or annoying to no end for various reasons. For me, it's not a reflection on that race/gender/whatever, but rather a reflection on that individual. While they may be a particular gender, race, religion, etc.... They do not represent every person who is in that race/religion/gender/etc. I've noticed there are trends in behavior among people of similar cultures.... Where a culture is usually consisting of people with similar race, National origin, religion, etc, but those trends do not and cannot inform my judgement of a person. Many races, religions, etc, belong to multiple cultures, and there are many examples of people from every culture that do not have the same ideologies, religion, or even personality traits, of their root culture, so again, this does not and cannot inform my thoughts about any one individual.

While similarities exist between people of similar or the same culture, each individual is, and must be, treated as an individual because every other system of determining the treatment of an individual, either socially or personally, is incomplete at best, and wildly inaccurate at worst.

Bringing it back to the point. I have no personal issue with any word that may or may not be considered offensive, either to me or others. Taking offense is an entirely personal matter wholly existing in the mind of the listener. As a matter of respect for my fellow person, I refrain from uttering such words that may cause unintentional offense to people as a matter of respect for those people. Furthermore, I respect all individuals I interact with at least enough to not desire to cause offense, especially regarding traits they cannot otherwise change, such as national heritage, race, gender, etc.

I would not personally have any issues using words that are currently considered offensive, if the groups that could be offended by those words were to stand up and say that the word will not be taken offensively.

The N-word specifically, appears to have it's etymology rooted in Spanish, where the word for the color black is literally "Negro". I feel that the word is a bastardized anglo mishearing of Negro, by slave owners, back when that was a thing; and as such, it has become inexorably tied to the concept of owning people, meanwhile the dictionary defines the N-word as literally a dark-skinned person (and correctly notes that it is a contemptuous term for such a person).

Words change meaning over time, as I'm sure the N-word first appeared in the dictionary as a dark skinned slave or something equally dehumanizing. The term has already evolved to simply be a dark-skinned person (contemptuous), and may evolve further to any number of potential future definitions.

If such a time arises that the word is no longer seen as offensive to the dark-skinned community, regardless of the speaker, then I would have no problem using the term in whatever context is appropriate for the new definition. If that context is that it should never be used, as it is now, then I will never use it. Full stop.

I have to much respect for people of all races, to use terms which would demean any race.

I still don't have a problem with it personally. I am also not a dark-skinned person. I maintain that my fellow humans should not allow the utterance of such a word to have any sway on their emotions. Don't give someone else control over you because they don't respect you enough that they'll use such offensive words. Don't give them that control. They're worthless humans.