this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2024
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[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'll grant that the poster is lopsided and misogynist. Maybe it's also misandrist.

I think people are getting confused because they think the poster is saying "this is how you should treat women". It's actually more like "You should know that this is how police will treat you".

And, at worst, some people may see this, see how horribly lopsided it is, and decide it MUST be full of shit and do the opposite.

I wish I had enough confidence in humanity to disagree.

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

If the poster reframes it as "this is how the police treat you" then I see it being a lot more favorable. If it also took a slightly less hard-line stance, insisting on affirmative consent for instance, it'd also fly better. Overall the message and intent of the poster is clearly a good one, but it's touching an area where every single person is so vastly different on, that nuance MUST be taken into consideration, or it's just going to hit wrong.

[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Yeah affirmative consent is good, but remember that a drunk person can't actually give affirmative consent.

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Again I think that's too narrow of advice to give. What is suitably drunk to prevent consent from being given? Where is the determining factor, and do you actually expect potentially inebriation, horny adolescents to be able to ascertain it?

Affirmative consent is a LOT harder to unintentionally give. It's easy to just mumble out an "mhm" to get the situations over with, but it takes thought and consideration to actually say words, "yes, I want you to -specific act-. Advising someone to always seek affirmative consent if they're unclear is MUCH more actionable.

[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 0 points 9 months ago (1 children)

do you actually expect potentially inebriation, horny adolescents to be able to ascertain it?

No, which is why they shouldn't have sex with people that are drunk.

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

That is one of those things that is just going to happen. People WILL engage in boundary pushing behavior. Be it sex while inebriated or something else. These things are normal, and saying broadly, "just don't do it" doesn't reduce any harm. More effective harm reduction comes with a degree of understanding and measure, saying at least obey these much more easily achievable guidelines.

[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 2 points 9 months ago

Yeah it's simplistic but that's the nature of a poster. I think giving someone an idea of the stakes is a good place to start.