this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
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It's still heavily stacked towards being men. If your end goal is to meet women that you can be friends with, and possibly date, you want to reverse those ratios.
For a first impression? It absolutely helps. That's the whole point of a first impression; they have absolutely nothing to go off but your appearance, so you need to make your appearance look as good as possible. Being bigger than, say, Dwayne Johnson in his prime probably isn't going to help. And the kind of fitness I'm talking about can absolutely be achieved without resorting to illegal drugs or cosmetic surgery.
That was how I got to and from work. Work was 14 miles, one way, in city traffic. I carried work clothes in a large messenger bag and changed when I got to work. (This obvs. doesn't work if you have a job that requires you to carry e.g. tools to and from job sites.)
Look, that's on you. But the idea that, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me" didn't work well for Stuart Smalley either. A lot of people think that you shouldn't have to change anything about who you are in order to find or attract a partner, or that people should 'accept me as I am'; I disagree with that. If you aren't finding people that are interested in who you are--and that you are likewise interested in--then the problem isn't with other people, it's within you, and incumbent on you to make the changes in yourself. You want your own psychological needs and desires met, but at the same time, you need to be ready and able to meet the needs and desires of another person. And yes, that means making changes. And those changes can be difficult and uncomfortable to make.
You can argue about which changes are, and are not, reasonable to make, but ultimately, if you aren't willing to make changes, then you can't expect to find what you say you want.
I have 6 of them (three Sphynx, one Cornish Rex, a Siamese, and a formerly feral Manx, down from an all-time high of 10). I'm aware. But I still pick up their toys, vacuum the floors/carpet/upholstery, clean their boxes, wipe up the food they pull out of their bowls, etc.