this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
10 points (100.0% liked)

Writing

1950 readers
4 users here now

A specific community for original shortform and longform writing, stories, worldbuilding, and other stuff of that nature.

Subcommunity of Creative

This community's icon was made by Aaron Schneider, under the CC-BY-NC-SA 4.0 license.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
alyaza@beehaw.org
mint@beehaw.org
remington@beehaw.org
10
Daybreak (A Poem) (beehaw.org)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Redlayn@beehaw.org to c/writing@beehaw.org
2 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Her presence intoxicating as the smell of sweet honey

her touch sends shivers down deep to the marrow of my bones

her gaze icy yet it burns me and everything within

every time I pray to hold her just for a minute longer

yet when the sun comes up she is no longer there my silent wish unanswered

the sheets next to me devoid of her warmth yet full of her fragrance

I sigh and close my eyes only to meet her again in my dreams

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[โ€“] Arotrios@kbin.social 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's good work, but just to let you know, your formatting is breaking when it's posted across instances - getting a code block with a bunch of <span style> tags over here on kbin.

Reprint as it appears beeshaw if your view is broken:

Her presence
intoxicating as
the smell of sweet honey

her touch sends shivers
down deep
to the marrow of my bones

her gaze icy
yet it burns me
and everything within

every time
I pray
to hold her
just for a minute longer

yet when the sun comes up
she is no longer there
my silent wish
unanswered

the sheets next to me
devoid of her warmth
yet full
of her fragrance

I sigh and close my eyes
only to meet her again
in my dreams

[โ€“] Redlayn@beehaw.org 2 points 1 year ago

thank you for letting me know :)