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You have 3 wishes (lemmy.world)

submitted 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) by EfreetSK@lemmy.world to c/comicstrips@lemmy.world

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[–] De_Narm@lemmy.world 250 points 4 months ago (6 children)

Doesn't work, since they are fulfilled sequentially.

Do the opposite of my next wish. -> Fulfilled, he is set to do the opposite next.

Don't fulfill my 3rd wish. -> Fulfilled, the wish does effectively nothing and he's got one left that will be fulfilled. All instructions from the first wish are done with and discarded.

Ignore my first wish. -> Fulfilled, there is nothing left to be ignored about his first wish anymore since it's already done. The wish does nothing and he successfully wasted all 3 by trying to be a smart ass.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 42 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I wonder if genies are subject to numerical integer underflow.

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 30 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They can be. If you wish for it.

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[–] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 25 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Also if the genie is a thinking agent or even just capable of detecting an infinite loop this falls apart.

[–] FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today 13 points 4 months ago (4 children)

Imagine trying to ward off a genie by yelling: "THIS STATEMENT IS FALSE!"

[–] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 3 points 4 months ago

POV you're about to encounter a little ol' Fate Worse Than Death

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[–] veni_vedi_veni@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (3 children)

You are now stuck in an infinite loop with a rabbit and turtle.

[–] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 2 points 4 months ago

I love your username. Is it meant to be a naughty bilingual pun?

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[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Yup, the genie just did that last bit to make him feel like he actually outsmarted him or something. In reality he's just glad he doesn't have to be around him any more.

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[–] Asifall@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago

I feel like this guy plays mtg

[–] oxideseven@lemmy.ca 2 points 4 months ago

Weird too, cus you could destroy the universe with 2 or even just 1 wish maybe?.

2 wishes: Repeat wish 2, repeat wish 1. Universe ends in magical overload.

1 wish: Don't fulfill this wish. I feel like that's less magical end of the universe and just death of the genie I guess?

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[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 62 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

First rule: don't fuck with djinn, hags, or fae. Demons maybe, at least you know what they want.

[–] FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today 9 points 4 months ago

When the demon tries to trip you up by asking for tea and cookies to be left out at night:

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 58 points 4 months ago (3 children)

You could have had fame, riches or beauty but instead you chose to be a dick.

[–] NABDad@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Do you think I asked for a 10 inch pianist?

[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

My smartass genie response would be to summon a severed 10 inch penis in their hands.

[–] TurtleTourParty@midwest.social 4 points 4 months ago

I would send them a jar from an animal in the Icelandic Phallological Museum. They never specified the species.

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[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 45 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Gratz, you played yourself and get no wishes.

[–] don@lemm.ee 2 points 4 months ago

maybe the real you played yourself was the wishes they made along the way

[–] Lightor@lemmy.world 30 points 4 months ago

Then on the third wish he just says "nah, that won't work" and you've just burned 2 and confused yourself.

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 18 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Again, from the last time this was reposted, none of these are wishes.

[–] rbn@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Why not? If I wish that someone ignores something, that's a valid wish IMO.

[–] CileTheSane@lemmy.ca 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Because they never say "wish", they just issue commands.

[–] rbn@sopuli.xyz 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I dunno. If he told the djinn 'Give me a nice car' or 'Make Trump eat a pile of dog poop' in response to the offering of 3 wishes, that qualifies as a wish to me even though it doesn't contain the word.

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[–] Lightrider@sh.itjust.works 15 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Those aren't wishes, just commands.

[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Ever heard of "your wish is my command?"

[–] Lightrider@sh.itjust.works 4 points 4 months ago

Yeah... That presumes you made a wish and not a command.

[–] Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

This is also assuming the Genie isn't a spiteful PoS that will just kill the Asker. There's no rule against that.

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[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

And yet... Monkey paw curls

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That oughta teach him a lesson

[–] LesserAbe@lemmy.world 4 points 4 months ago

How dare he try to grant my wishes

[–] FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today 12 points 4 months ago

Even if any of the three wishes are deemed valid or invalid the net result will be nothing happens, no?

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 11 points 4 months ago

Genies hate computer software developers

[–] key@lemmy.keychat.org 11 points 4 months ago

Wish 1 cancels out wish 2, leaving us with the default state of granting the third wish. The genie grants the third wish by biting his tongue and ignoring how stupid the first wish was.

[–] HeapOfDogs@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Does everyone not understand this yet? The only winning move with a genie is to not play.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 19 points 4 months ago

Wrong, and geniephobic.

[–] then_three_more@lemmy.world 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I wish to know the true name of the genie who is granting me wishes.
I wish [genie's true name] to be freed, mortal and without magical powers, now and henceforth.

[–] HeapOfDogs@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

You are now trapped in a bottle.

[–] Lumisal@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I think I saw a video once explaining how the only winning move is to make your wish be to let the genie grant you what you desire most.

Because only the genie as the wish granter has access to all possibilities a wish good grant, but you don't, so your wish could always be misinterpreted, while the genies knowledge cannot be.

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[–] unreachable@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

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[–] LesserAbe@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Wish one, genie give me a copy of your private key for the wish granting API

[–] Godnroc@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago

Granted, you are now a genie with access to the wish granting API private key. Make all the copies you like.

[–] phoenixz@lemmy.ca 4 points 4 months ago

I liked the one from that classic twilight zone episode better wherte the (i believe mathematician) told the genie to "get lost"

[–] MustaSpiraali@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 months ago

Genies hate this one trick.

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