this post was submitted on 12 Jul 2024
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I'm visiting extended family for the first time in a long time, and one of my nieces has reached the impressionable age where she keeps mimicking things that she sees me do. what's a really funny but fairly harmless thing I should teach her to do?

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[–] Sanctus@lemmy.world 138 points 4 months ago (3 children)

It'd be hilarious if you taught her how to code Fortran.

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 84 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] tiefling@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 4 months ago

Hey this might make her millions in the future

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[–] SidewaysHighways@lemmy.world 89 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Flicking your cheek just right to make the water drop noise

[–] DessertStorms@lemmy.blahaj.zone 17 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

This is evil

donkey makes popping noise

(not exactly the same noise but can be used to the same effect)

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.world 13 points 4 months ago

OP, do this one

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[–] kromem@lemmy.world 68 points 4 months ago (2 children)

On a vacation when I was a teenager I taught my younger sibling the "SYN/ACK" game.

They still remember the TCP stack handshake protocol including resets and acks years later.

[–] 0_0j@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago

Lol, kid will sniff packets next

[–] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 12 points 4 months ago

What kind of game is this? Never heard of it

[–] Iamsqueegee@sh.itjust.works 64 points 4 months ago (1 children)

My niece and nephew loved the β€œthis guy” gag. What’s got two thumbs and thinks you’re the coolest? THIS GUY! and point to yourself with your thumbs.

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 55 points 4 months ago

Teach her to order something off a foreign-language menu, invite the family out to dinner, and see if she can place her order fluently.

Doing the "Five year old white girl shocks waitress by ordering Orange Chicken in perfect Mandarian" bit IRL would be pretty funny and adorable.

[–] zakobjoa@lemmy.world 48 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I've thought my niece that policemen go "oink oink" and that pigs go "You have the right to remain silent!"

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[–] knightly@pawb.social 46 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (5 children)

Lockpicking

Using Linux

Media piracy

Feeding the homeless

Wheatpasting / graffiti

Political theory

Shoplifting from corporate chains

First Aid

Legal observation

Black bloc tactics

Guerilla gardening

Spotting plainclothes cops / informants

Dialectical Materialism

[–] OsaErisXero@kbin.run 21 points 4 months ago

Idk about some of these given the age bracket, but Spot the Fed is fun for the whole family.

She could configure linux from scratch

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[–] TootSweet@lemmy.world 46 points 4 months ago
  • Beatboxing. "Boots and cats and boots and cats"-style.
  • The pulling your thumb off trick.
  • The Macarena.
  • "The Game". ("You just lost The Game.")
  • Chopsticks on the piano/keyboard/toy xylophone/etc.
  • "The Name Game."
[–] WatDabney@sopuli.xyz 44 points 4 months ago (2 children)
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[–] kitnaht@lemmy.world 42 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

A buddy of mine taught his 5 yr old daughter to tell people "One time, at band camp...I stuck a flute in my..." *long pause* "nose".

And he gets joy remembering all of the people go wide-eyed waiting for that next word out of her mouth.

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[–] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 38 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Teach her how she can insert "apparently" into every statement.

[–] BananaPeal@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

My 8 year old starts almost every sentence with "By the way."

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[–] sundray@lemmus.org 37 points 4 months ago (2 children)

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"CHICKEN BUTT!"

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[–] UpperBroccoli@lemmy.blahaj.zone 35 points 4 months ago

I taught my niece to say "I can't work like this!". That was fun!

[–] Nomad@infosec.pub 33 points 4 months ago (2 children)

I taught my kid to say "mom drinks beer for breakfast" as soon as she could talk. Wasn't that popular with the family xD

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[–] InputZero@lemmy.ml 33 points 4 months ago (4 children)

If she's the right age, Teach her The Game. It's a brain virus game.

Rule number 1 of The Game, you can not think about The Game. When you think about The Game you lose.

Rule number 2, when you think of The Game you have to say that you've lost The Game. Ideally loudly and publicly.

Rule number 3, after losing the game you get 30 minutes grace period to stop thinking about it before The Game starts again.

Rule number 4, once you have learned about the game you may either play the game or cheat.

[–] Captainvaqina@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 months ago

Dangit. It's been years. You flipping flipper.

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[–] Subnet64@lemmy.world 33 points 4 months ago (1 children)
[–] DessertStorms@lemmy.blahaj.zone 20 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Alternatively - hand farts for the times it's too hot to want to stick a hand in your armpit lol

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 11 points 4 months ago

Seconding hand farts. I've never seen anyone wash their hands after doing armpit farts.

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[–] riskable@programming.dev 29 points 4 months ago

How to tie her shoes the instant/quick way. She'll be the coolest kid to all her peers and even amaze other parents who witness it...

https://youtu.be/Q5qZpQe_4EA?si=6fPhLyHs5BwJoaoA

(I have no affiliation with that channel it was just the first thing that came up when I searched)

[–] Hello_there@fedia.io 24 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

End every other sentence with ~ nya ~

[–] ace_garp@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

The drums.

Or a less chaotic-evil suggestion, that water-drop sound made by flicking your cheek.

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[–] gac11@lemmy.world 16 points 4 months ago

I have had pretty good luck with doing

High five Up high Down low Too slow

My nephew would just let me do it forever, always trying to beat me on the too slow bit.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Give her some unconventional future career ideas. Non-edgy ones, of course. I think it would be pretty funny if after a visit from an uncle your kid was talking about sailing knots or embalming procedures or something.

[–] wuphysics87@lemmy.ml 15 points 4 months ago

I taught my 18 month year old niece the sound a dinosaur makes. ROOOOOOOAAAR

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 13 points 4 months ago
[–] m__a__b@lemmy.ca 13 points 4 months ago

Pull my finger.

[–] pelletbucket@lemm.ee 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

i decided to let her watch Smackdown with me. we'll see what she picks up as a surprise for mom & dad

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[–] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 12 points 4 months ago

Juggling ? beginning with two balls is fairly easy and is a slippery gateway to more balls

[–] fubarx@lemmy.ml 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Poker. And proper bluffing.

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[–] Tarball@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Teach her to take a drink and then smack her lips and say, β€œahhh”.

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[–] CentrifugalChicken@lemm.ee 11 points 4 months ago

We got my niece to speak a little Klingon.

[–] falk1856@midwest.social 10 points 4 months ago (2 children)

That it's pronounced heliclopter and not helicopter.

[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 18 points 4 months ago

Helico-pter

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[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 10 points 4 months ago

Gang signs.

[–] FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 9 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Dad jokes or anti jokes maybe? Math formulas? A foreign language?

[–] oessessnex@programming.dev 9 points 4 months ago

Play chess.

[–] lemonSqueezy@lemmy.world 9 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Tell her a fun fact, in your best science teacher tone. It takes one billion microseconds to get to one second. Hopefully she can run with this and ask more questions.

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