this post was submitted on 29 Sep 2024
104 points (95.6% liked)

Not The Onion

12543 readers
444 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

"Now, Victor is a powerful boy, and even his sneezes are powerful."

Sammy Sosa strained his back ligaments in 2004 by sneezing, rendering him unable to play for 15 days. In 2015, Lindsey Vonn was hospitalized after she hurt her thumb breaking up a fight between her dogs. Michael Jordan severed a tendon in his finger in 1999 while cutting a cigar. Glenallen Hill, an outfielder for the Toronto Blue Jays, ended up with cuts and carpet burns after he tried to escape spiders in a nightmare in 1990. And in 1996, Bruce Walker, a defensive lineman for the New England Patriots, wound up with a chest injury while playing catch with a knife.

Last week, Croix Bethune, a midfielder for the Washington Spirit, injured her knee after she threw out the ceremonial first pitch at a Washington Nationals game. She will miss the remainder of the National Women’s Soccer League season.

top 5 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] ThePowerOfGeek@lemmy.world 22 points 2 months ago

Back in the early 2000s, Arsenal and England goalkeeper David Seaman pulled his back by reaching for his TV remote control. He was out for a few weeks as a result.

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

I once threw out my back taking a bong rip.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 2 months ago

I sprained my neck when I was around 13, when I turned my head to look out the back of a car window. So lame and weird.

Also, my uncle broke his collar bone throwing a ball when he was a kid.