this post was submitted on 03 Dec 2024
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Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

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[–] Makhno@lemmy.world 11 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Something that definitely happened

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 8 points 7 hours ago

And all the guys at the urinals cheered, and bumped hips whilst continuing to pee

[–] Mandy@sh.itjust.works 174 points 1 day ago (4 children)

It aint a blog meme without a useless comment at the bottom

[–] blind3rdeye@lemm.ee 57 points 1 day ago (1 children)

But if we didn't have a reaction included in the post, how would we know how we're meant to feel?

[–] SLVRDRGN@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Just realized blog-meme-commentary are functionally equivalent to sitcom laugh tracks.

[–] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

You're so right.^it's me, I'm the commentary^

[–] ddplf@szmer.info 20 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Of course I'm not watching this 1m20s video without a webcam of an obnoxious guy wearing a spiderman outfit yelling in the corner of the screen.

[–] Sorse@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I’m not watching this 30 se*ond video without subway surfers gameplay

[–] SeekPie@lemm.ee 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago

I choked on my uselessness.

[–] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Bonus points if it's Xavier.

[–] sabreW4K3@lazysoci.al 46 points 1 day ago (3 children)

I've talked on the shitter. I heard someone dying and asked if they needed help, they never replied, just did up their belt and fled in panic. Never again!

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 25 points 1 day ago

I rather die alone on a toilet than talk while pooping. I'd flee too.

[–] grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yep. Heard a coworker vomiting her guts out in the accessible stall and I asked if she needed help. Turns out she was just having morning sickness.

[–] Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 7 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

A few months ago I went to a steakhouse with some friends and learned that 3 ladies from the wedding party in the party room had had too much to drink and were sharing a stall (small bathroom with only 2 stalls) puking their guts out for a solid 20 minutes straight. As we paid and left we saw the paramedics arrive to escort the ladies off of the premises and an employee poised and ready with cleaning supplies to begin cleaning up the wreckage their stomachs had wrought upon the porcelain.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 3 points 6 hours ago

Some of those who shake cocktails...
Are the same that clean stall spills...

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

LOL oh man this story is so funny to me. I'm picturing it from both people's points of view and its hilarious either way.

[–] pHr34kY@lemmy.world 62 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

This is bullshit because no bloke has ever mumbled a word in a dunny block.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 23 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Your use of "bloke" implies you're in the UK, so perhaps it's just manners... But as someone who has worked in a large, multi-cultural office in the US, it is definitely a cultural thing. There are some people that have no problem chatting on the phone at full volume, in an echo-y stall, while audibly shitting. And I mean audibly lol.

I have had one experience where I was sitting in the middle stall, of three, between two people who were having a full-on conversation back and forth over me. I kept like clearing my throat just in case maybe they didn't realize someone was there... Nope, they just didn't care lol.

Just the thought of behaving like that is mortifying to me lol, especially in an office where I have to then interact with those people...

[–] state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

There are some people that have no problem chatting on the phone at full volume, in an echo-y stall, while audibly shitting. And I mean audibly lol.

I experienced that in New Jersey once. A man was speaking Spanish, presumably while on the phone. And he was very audibly taking a shit. He even continued talking while straining to push the poop out.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I've seen this mostly for couriers or workers who are actively monitored and don't have time for themselves

[–] state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

I kind of get that. But I still feel it would be incredibly rude if someone called me and I could hear them on the shitter. But that's my personal sensibility.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 1 points 6 hours ago

I think the idea is that the other person just hears occasional ppppts or running water and assumes the person is in a busy boiler room or cooking.

[–] pHr34kY@lemmy.world 6 points 21 hours ago

I'm an Aussie. Same king, different colony :P

Crosstalk while trying to dump a load sounds horrendous.

[–] FireRetardant@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No one has ever offered to play battle shits with you?

[–] Shardikprime@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

It's a solo game unless you are in the special competitive pvp stalls

[–] mkhopper@lemmy.world 31 points 1 day ago (2 children)

The urinals didn't tip her off?

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 49 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

I've been in men's room recently that didn't have urinals in view when I walked in. Which did give me a slight panic for a moment that I had walked into the wrong door.

I opened the first stall door, and there was the urinal. Interesting.

They had also adopted the European style of floor to ceiling stalls and stall doors. It was actually a very nice experience.

[–] twei@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 1 day ago

Common European W

[–] Ultraviolet@lemmy.world 2 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

The stall only contained a urinal? What happens if you need to take a shit?

[–] Matthew@midwest.social 7 points 22 hours ago

You don't use that stall. What happens if you have to shit at any given time, go looking for urinals?

[–] tweeks@feddit.nl 3 points 21 hours ago

It's a bit weird though yeah, especially if you are waiting in line for that stall to open and only when entering discover it's not going to suffice your needs.

Maybe the guy sitting next to her was in the wrong bathroom.

[–] agent_nycto@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I like that the response from guys isn't "a woman?! In MY bathroom?!?!" But "who tf talks in the bathroom?!"

[–] lars@lemmy.sdf.org 0 points 7 hours ago

I have been told that Lemmy leans ever so slightly left of center if not out right progressive. If you squint, you might catch a glimpse some day.

[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 4 points 23 hours ago

you're both liars

[–] Sidyctism2@discuss.tchncs.de 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

chooooooooke on the water~

[–] ArtVandelay@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Hand dryers in the skyyy

[–] jaybone@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

snack pack in disguise…

[–] Fizz 12 points 1 day ago (8 children)

Who the are these people talking in the stalls. I be worried someone would try and kick my ass. I've seen people go ape shit if you disturb them during a shit in public.

[–] swab148@lemm.ee 5 points 1 day ago

I once had a friend of mine go into the stall next to mine and loudly declare that we were "pooping buddies"

[–] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

All of my coworkers, they will just strike up work combo.

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[–] ProdigalFrog@slrpnk.net 10 points 1 day ago

Yep. Savin' that one

[–] anarchyrabbit@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Who is drinking water is a toilet stall? Don't ya'll know the little poo particles go in there?

[–] __ghost__@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 day ago

I hate that I laughed

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