1168
Holmium (lemmy.nz)
submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
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[-] snooggums@piefed.world 99 points 11 months ago

You wanted to go camping but fucked it up because you were drunk.

[-] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 75 points 11 months ago

No, that sounds like camping to me.

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 11 months ago

Yeah, the first mistake everyone makes when camping is deciding to go camping.

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[-] TxzK@lemmy.zip 78 points 11 months ago

Also pretty sure I didn't want to run over an orphanage and kill 37 children

[-] Amputret@lemmy.dbzer0.com 101 points 11 months ago

How big are your feet? Holy shit.

[-] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 40 points 11 months ago

It's not the size of the feet that count. It's how many orphans you kill.

[-] Winter_Oven@piefed.social 22 points 11 months ago

Make every step count.

[-] lennee@lemmy.world 19 points 11 months ago

how small were the orphans?

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[-] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 68 points 11 months ago

When I was an alcoholic, I wanted to keep my best friend from ruining his marriage by having an affair, so I tried to murder him with a gun. Pretty sure I would've gone about it differently had I been sober.

[-] MeatPilot@lemmy.world 40 points 11 months ago

There needs to be more context to this story.

[-] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 41 points 11 months ago

We were working together in a different state; he kept talking about this girl we worked with; we got drunk at her place- some of us (me) drunker than others; he gave me a ride back to the house we were renting and then went back to the party; I was convinced he was gonna sleep with the girl, and was infuriated he'd do that to his lovely wife and their daughter; I got my pistol and was gonna shoot him when he got home; I was too drunk to chamber a round; our other roommate was there and wrestled the gun away from me.

It's an insane bit of logic. "In order to keep you from ruining your marriage, I'm going to kill you."

His wife ended up sleeping with her boss a few years later, too, so. 🤷‍♂️

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago

"I can't let you ruin your life, so I will ruin both of us for you, buddy!"

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[-] Guilvareux@feddit.uk 13 points 11 months ago

I think in terms of thought process, we probably have all the context available…

[-] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago

"You think I'm going to just let you ruin your marriage? You're my best friend. I'll kill you you stupid bastard."

[-] Syltti@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

Men, don't settle for a best friend who won't threaten to kill you.

[-] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

Also maybe make sure there's a second friend nearby at all times.

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[-] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 14 points 11 months ago

Gosh, that's... a lot.

"When I was an alcoholic" I hope that the "was" in your comment means that you're in a better place now. I also hope your best friend is still your friend and/or that he didn't end up ruining his life (or that he was able to rebuild a half decent life from the wreckage of his mistakes)

[-] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I finally read the entirety of your comment, as I had wrongly assumed you had just quoted me the whole time (might wanna check your markup btw)

But yes, I've been sober for 7 years now. We maintain a loose friendship, like stereotypical men do with one another; he did not sleep with the girl, but his wife did sleep with her boss a few years after this whole kerfuffle. Is that irony?

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[-] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 39 points 11 months ago

I'm in the Navy. If you can't do your job while drunk you can't do your job.

[-] ryedaft@sh.itjust.works 31 points 11 months ago

I'm European. If you can still do your job just drink more!

[-] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

My dad was blown away when he had to go do work at auto plants overseas in Europe (prob germany?) and the breakroom vending machines had beer in them. I guess there was a 2 beer unofficial limit. This was like 3 decades ago... So maybe it's changed.

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[-] jve@lemmy.world 34 points 11 months ago

Definitely wanted to throw up on my shoes, just didn’t have the courage.

[-] Aljernon@lemmy.today 14 points 11 months ago

Definitely also want to throw up on your shoes, working up the courage now

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[-] Lightsong@lemmy.world 33 points 11 months ago

Actually it's pretty comfortable. I worked in landscaping and whenever I'm on break, I'd sit in a wheelbarrow. It's cool and the shape fits your body pretty well.

[-] dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de 20 points 11 months ago

If you’re shaped like SpongeBob?

[-] Lightsong@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago

Nah, you sit with your feet between the wheelbarrow handlers and it'll tilt toward with handlers acting as chair legs, so you're basically sitting in the chair. And I'm 6'2, it's really comfortable, you'd be surprised. And most wheelbarrows aren't square, they're like round or tapered at where your head rests.

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[-] cypherix93@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

or a slightly smaller wheelbarrow

[-] Fedizen@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

In fitness circles they call it "Barrel Bod"

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[-] RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 32 points 11 months ago

The first saying is pretty idiotic

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[-] Fedizen@lemmy.world 29 points 11 months ago

This is why I crash my car into a tree everytime I drive sober.

[-] SleeplessCityLights@programming.dev 29 points 11 months ago

I was in a long term relationship with someone with a drinking problem. When a drunk person says something to you they fucking mean it. Their filter is weaker and, as I label it "they have the courage to say something that they were afraid to say sober." When you figure this out everything is easier to understand.

[-] Rekorse@sh.itjust.works 26 points 11 months ago

Not every drunk/alcoholic person is the same. Bummer you had that experience though.

[-] village604@adultswim.fan 24 points 11 months ago

There's an old saying that the first thought in your head is what you're conditioned to think, and the second is what you actually think. Kind of an ego/id thing.

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[-] MBech@feddit.dk 12 points 11 months ago

I regularly tell people I absolutely hate that I love them while drunk. It's how my brain makes sure I don't tell them to go fuck themselves.... I also tell everyone i like, that I love them though....

[-] Aljernon@lemmy.today 12 points 11 months ago

True to an extent but there's also a level of brain damage that can come with long term alcoholism (or extreme intoxication) where they lose the ability to form coherent thoughts while plastered and their drunk ramblings can be contradictory.

[-] liuther9@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

Alcohol makes you feel and act different way. Your statement is not correct

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[-] yesman@lemmy.world 23 points 11 months ago
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[-] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 23 points 11 months ago

I actually agree with the sentiment of this post even though there are obvious exceptions. Your character doesn't change when you're drunk, just your inhibitions. So yeah, getting drunk reminds me I can be an asshole and probably I want to be more often than I do.

But you know what I've never done while even blackout drunk? I've never cheated on my wife. Because I don't want to do that. I've had crazy hot women ask me to hook up and I was too drunk to even say, sorry I'm married. All I could get out was naww.

I've felt bad because I have seen devistation in the face of young women being blown off by an older dude but I was too drunk to express myself. I was also probably too drunk to be a great lover at that time, so maybe I did them a favor. But when you're that drunk and the next morning all you can remember is destroying the ego of a skinny 25 year old, you know you didn't imagine it.

[-] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 21 points 11 months ago

The alcohol just removes all filters. So yes, you wanted to sleep, but at normal times you'd be too embarassed to not sleep in your bed. With alcohol, it's sleepy time, you sleep and that wheelbarrow looks a lot more inviting than the floor.

[-] Senseless@feddit.org 13 points 11 months ago

It just felt comfy at that time. And I was tired.. so tired.

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[-] rumba@lemmy.zip 12 points 11 months ago

If all drinking did was limit inhibition, but it also clouds your judgment and slows your reflexes. Some people cannot think things all the way through when intoxicated.

[-] TwoForJuanBagelSale@feddit.org 12 points 11 months ago

when people say this you can instantly disregard any worth you may have thought they had.

[-] pfr@lemmy.sdf.org 11 points 11 months ago

It's sex. She's talking about sex.

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[-] MeatPilot@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

Got me, I did want to hug a toilet all night well the room was spinning.

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this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2025
1168 points (99.2% liked)

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