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It’s cardboard, not depleted uranium. How the fuck is it so dangerous I must dispose of it if damaged? The entire point of the product is for the furry psychopath that lives with me to damage it. It literally has no other reason to exist.

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[-] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 110 points 8 months ago

The whole "discard if damaged" is likely just standard cover-your-ass legalese which the lawyers will copy-paste on every single product they sell, including this one.

[-] fizzle@quokk.au 40 points 8 months ago

It's this.

Lawyers: put the warnings on everything. Managers: what warnings? Lawyers: the warnings. Managers: yeah but Lawyers: on everything.

[-] idunnololz@lemmy.world 21 points 8 months ago

WARNING: This product contains chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer, birth defects, or other reproductive harm.

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 5 points 8 months ago

It's like on medication when it says something along the lines of, do not take this medication if you are allergic to this medication or think you might be allergic to this medication.

Good now it's your fault if you have an allergic reaction.

[-] pimento64@sopuli.xyz 2 points 8 months ago

All subjects intending to handle high-energy gamma-leaking portal technology must be informed that they may be informed of applicable regulatory compliance issues. No further compliance information is required or will be provided—and you are an excellent test subject.

[-] heydo@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago

I would imagine this same label is applied to all of their products as a cost savings measure.

[-] fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 62 points 8 months ago

Gets damage, kid uses it as a stool, falls, parents decide to blame the company.

Pretty run of the mill situation tbh.

[-] clmbmb@lemmy.dbzer0.com 41 points 8 months ago
[-] fushuan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 27 points 8 months ago

I presumed that since they mentioned a lawsuit.

[-] monkeyslikebananas2@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago

True. Everyone knows other countries have no laws! /s

[-] Klear@quokk.au 26 points 8 months ago

We do have laws! Just no suits. Everyone is naked here.

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[-] Sludge@sh.itjust.works 12 points 8 months ago

These things actually only degrade as your cat uses them in America. Elsewhere the cardboard doesn't mix with hair and fall off into little cardboard chunks that are attractive for small children to eat. Also, the structural integrity actually only gets stronger in other parts of the world, so you're actually encouraged to step on it, as after some play and what might seem like structural damage to a piece of cardboard, it can actually support the weight of a fully grown adult.

[-] naeap@sopuli.xyz 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Doesn't it?
The small pieces the cat rips out fill the holes and make the structure stronger, until the cat can't use it anymore, because it's too strong for its claws
Then we use it as bricks for our houses

Haven't you seen the cardboard quarries full of cats working their ass off?

Edit: on a second thought, that's also why de-clawing is unethical here, because it hinders our never ending demand on bricks...

[-] shalafi@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

You only hear about the ridiculous lawsuits. Local lawyer used to explain it on the radio all the time.

  • Media doesn't report on the 99.98% of boring, and meritorious, lawsuits
  • Judges toss frivolous cases
  • Lawyers are loath to bring frivolous cases due to reputational harm, even disbarment

Our sense of risk is absurdly out of whack with reality.

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 2 points 8 months ago

According to a friend who's a lawyer she once had to explain to someone that she can't sue her landlord because she slipped on a wet floor, since it was her house and therefore her wet floor. The landlord merely owns the house, but didn't make the floor wet.

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[-] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 35 points 8 months ago

I remember a summer about 10 years ago, when I went out at the beginning of summer to buy some new pool noodles. I looked everywhere, and couldn't find them, all summer.

The next year, they were back, but they all had new tags that said "Not to be inserted rectally."

Suddenly, I knew why they hadn't been available, as lawsuits and regulatory issues got worked out. All because someone looked at a pool noodle, and got a weird idea.

[-] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 17 points 8 months ago

So you put it in your butt right?

[-] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 5 points 8 months ago

Yeah, I wondered if it actually gave some people the idea: "Hmmm, hadn't thought of that, but now that you mention it..."

[-] cheesybuddha@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

Or a friends butt. Get permission first though

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[-] riskable@programming.dev 30 points 8 months ago

Clearly, you do not understand THE POWER of corrugated cardboard!

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[-] bluesheep@sh.itjust.works 29 points 8 months ago

The dangers of corrugated cardboard are unknown to most, it's good they're trying to spread awereness

[-] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago

We should do a fun run to raise money for victims of corrugated cardboard abuse.

[-] muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 3 points 8 months ago

-in the arms of the angles plays-

[-] Madison420@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago

the angles

I've always wanted to be held by a kind gentle right angle.

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 27 points 8 months ago

That Spanish translation is awful

[-] Chivera@lemmy.world 17 points 8 months ago

Your favorite pet only 😂

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[-] papalonian@lemmy.world 17 points 8 months ago

Maybe your cat is dumb, rips a chunk out, decides to eat it, cat could get sick or catch fire or something

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[-] Avicenna@programming.dev 14 points 8 months ago

sounds like liability cover

[-] Doomsider@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Choking hazard, next.

[-] bulwark@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

It's because for the corpo, it's cheaper to say it might hurt you than to not say anything at all.

[-] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 12 points 8 months ago

My kayak has this warning on it. When everything warns you it causes cancer people no longer take the warnings seriously. Now where did my Cobalt 60 lollipop go.

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 2 points 8 months ago

I've seen this warning on a t-shirt. Not on the label of the t-shirt, the actual design of the t-shirt. Which presumably also constitutes a warning, I bet the lawyers love that one.

[-] altphoto@lemmy.today 10 points 8 months ago

The Spanish is wack. That last line says to only use it for your favorite pet.

[-] muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 5 points 8 months ago

“Bad kitty! That’s for the superior cat!”

[-] cupcakezealot@piefed.blahaj.zone 9 points 8 months ago

take this item but beware it comes with a terrible curse

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[-] Blackmist@feddit.uk 9 points 8 months ago

It's for cats to scratch. It's supposed to be damaged.

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[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

Drop and run

[-] Ioughttamow@fedia.io 4 points 8 months ago

That was the bridge to Tarabithia 😢

[-] echodot@feddit.uk 3 points 8 months ago

It makes it sound like some cursed item. Get the SCP on this.

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[-] ulterno@programming.dev 3 points 8 months ago

Maybe someone ate it and got food poisoning?

[-] BussyCat@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago

The last line mentions not using it as a step so maybe someone was stepping on it and after a while it broke down and they fell and sued

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[-] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 8 months ago

The do not use as a step thing I could see, trying to think of other misuses though, other than eating shit you shouldn't.

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this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2025
363 points (98.9% liked)

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