Cell phone: talkie walkie

Mausoleum: roomy tomb-y

Armor: hardy guardy

Honorable mention:

gun = rooty tooty point-n-shooty

That poor keming is so distracting!

Credit should go to Nathan Pyle where this content originated with a less insane font.

https://y.yarn.co/c7ccb26c-29e7-471c-a2c5-6d75c104e4c2_text.gif

Defibrillators aren't used to start your heart though. Quite the opposite actually.

They're used to get you out of an abnormal heart rhythm, by briefly stopping your heart, and letting your body restart it on it's own, hopefully with a regular rythm.

sitty shitty