this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2024
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Alcohol and weed don't sound appealing.

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[–] rustyfish@lemmy.world 78 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Sleep on her side of the bed. Then don’t tell her what you did.

[–] GregorTacTac@lemm.ee 20 points 10 months ago

This is some next-level chaos.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

She'll know. The smell. Also the breadcrumbs.

[–] SadLuther@lemmy.kya.moe 6 points 10 months ago

And bits of dried pizza cheese.

[–] SuperSynthia@lemmy.world 31 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When my partner is out of town, I put porn on the big screen

[–] scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When my partner is out of town that's the one time I splurge for an actual porn subscription

[–] zloubida@lemmy.world 28 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Don't change your underwear for two days.

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] zloubida@lemmy.world 19 points 10 months ago

I'm proud of you.

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 28 points 10 months ago

Do what I do, plan for porn, fastfood and beer. In reality you buy a six pack of your old brand, then drink half a beer with a large cheeseburger. Get queasy from the burger and fall a sleep before you manage to play with yourself. Wake up to find that the dog ate your fries and got diarrhea, which you slept through on account of the beer. Now clean up dog diarrhea with hangovers while swearing that you'll never drink half a beer.

LPT: disable the roomba before sitting down, and make sure that the dog has been walked...

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 28 points 10 months ago (1 children)

He said he only had a weekend though.

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

"Alcohol and weed don't sound appealing."

We are not the same meme

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (4 children)

I lasted like 40 mins before hitting the vape pen

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 7 points 10 months ago

Again, Factorio

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[–] sicarius@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Try a tab of lsd and go for a nice walk in the woods

[–] beercupcake@sopuli.xyz 6 points 10 months ago

Just to add to this. Take a nice shower, eat something light, wear comfy cloths, and take your trip. Stay safe, enjoy, and have bottle of water with you :)

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ugh. I hate it when people have a far easier time than I do finding drugs. Every dealer assumes I’m a cop

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Mushrooms are sold in head shops in Oakland, California. I understand that to be the case in a number of cities. You may be able to make your way to one of them.

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[–] JoBo@feddit.uk 14 points 10 months ago (2 children)
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[–] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

If you don’t like alcohol or weed, cocaine is a helluva drug.

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 19 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Heh yeah. I'll just call up my xoke dealer.

Edit:

bout to get wild

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 9 points 10 months ago

Aww yeah, gonna get the iron warmed up for an all nighter

[–] Saigonauticon@voltage.vn 13 points 10 months ago

Ooh, study for 14 hours straight and forget to eat! That's usually what I do. Wild times.

[–] federalreverse@feddit.de 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago (2 children)

What about the sink I poop in?

[–] Saik0Shinigami@lemmy.saik0.com 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] scorpious@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

Waffle stomp!

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[–] all-knight-party@kbin.run 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)

I watch horribly artsy movies or put speed runs on the big TV, blast music aloud, I order a pizza, and I consume the substances you don't find appealing, and I wear the same clothes the entire time without changing

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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Cocaine feels like a good time.

[–] TheFriar@lemm.ee 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Cocaine feels like the need for more cocaine.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

No one has ever been more correct.

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[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago

You guys are amazing

[–] flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works 8 points 10 months ago

Rearrange the lounge, or if you want to play it safe, maybe just the shed

[–] jtom@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

grind leetcode

[–] kandoh@reddthat.com 3 points 10 months ago

Buy one of those silicone eggs to jerk off with

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 10 months ago

Truest statement.

[–] dbilitated@aussie.zone 2 points 10 months ago
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