this post was submitted on 04 May 2024
322 points (92.8% liked)

Programmer Humor

19623 readers
96 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Schal330@lemmy.world 49 points 6 months ago (9 children)

Removed double quotes, added single quotes

[–] iAvicenna@lemmy.world 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

someone later on -m "removed single quotes, added double quotes"

[–] QuazarOmega@lemy.lol 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

More commits == More money!!!

[–] gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 months ago (5 children)

Real talk: I have worked at a company where an exec briefly had the bright idea to rank developers on number of commits made.

You can imagine how that turned out.

He wasn’t an exec for very long.

load more comments (5 replies)
load more comments (8 replies)
[–] 1boiledpotato@sh.itjust.works 36 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"Update"

It was my dotfiles, ok?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] steersman2484@sh.itjust.works 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] Assman@sh.itjust.works 8 points 6 months ago (3 children)

My commit messages have gotten extremely lazy since I start squashing all my commits down to one. I just describe the PR on the first commit message and write nonsense in all the others.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] generaldenmark@programming.dev 27 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

grats on formalising your (new) project

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] alyth@lemmy.world 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Tests: Add a few test files.

[–] eskimofry@lemmy.world 16 points 6 months ago

I thought we lost you ... Jia Tan!

[–] camr_on@lemmy.world 18 points 6 months ago

God read my code and it made Him cry

[–] ving_thor@lemmy.one 16 points 6 months ago (7 children)

Update coffee list and tex files.

...and yes we have our office coffee list in a git repo.

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] Zahtu@feddit.de 16 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"Changed consent banner text to reflect from legal, even though they are wrong"

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 13 points 6 months ago

"circumvented GDPR despite calling out strong ethical objections, because legal & management are forcing me to"

[–] AllHailTheSheep@sh.itjust.works 15 points 6 months ago

"fix for real this time"

[–] Jyek@sh.itjust.works 13 points 6 months ago

"28496 - there, it's fucking fixed you twat waffle."

Ticketed bug bosses son found. Dude nagged his dad who nagged us until it got fixed. Boss doesn't review code. And for the sake of a half dozen coworkers, I hope he never does.

[–] FreshLight@sh.itjust.works 12 points 6 months ago

"I'm sorry, guys."

[–] Sylvartas@lemmy.world 12 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (4 children)

";"

Previous commit was some stupid easy fix I didn't even bother compiling. Well, I should have, because it was the first time in recent memory I committed some code with a missing semicolon...

Before anyone asks : no, we don't do reviews ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] iflyspaceships@lemmy.world 11 points 6 months ago

Hrfg7ygfrvvby

[–] grrgyle@slrpnk.net 11 points 6 months ago

wip: good luck you monday fuck hahahaha

[–] joshcodes@programming.dev 11 points 6 months ago

git commit -m "if this doesn't fix it I'm looking up availabilities at my nearest maccas"

[–] Mikufan@ani.social 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

/* due to customer repeatedly deleting code and backups because they where "unnecessary" we refuse to work with said customer from now on. Whoever is in charge after us, be warned.*/

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] DumbAceDragon@sh.itjust.works 10 points 6 months ago

"My laptop died before I could push these"

Not a good commit name I know, but my laptop stopped booting and I just really needed to continue from my desktop.

It's a student project anyway.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

French dead link?

[–] xmunk@sh.itjust.works 9 points 6 months ago

Converted more tests to use the correct handle.

[–] quinkin@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

Fix for vendor lies.

[–] TRBoom@lemm.ee 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

hoho

I had just figured out how to fix a bug that broke our in house reminder system. My smug ass put hoho as the commit message for figuring something out that the previous guy couldn't. Of course it came back to bite me in the ass THIS WEEK when the system broke again in a similar fashion, but I couldn't remember what I had done.

[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

A

Because who cares for commit messages to my private repo?

[–] Shareni@programming.dev 23 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You when you mess something up and only figure it out later?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] bravesilvernest@lemmy.ml 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] skip0110@lemm.ee 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] nothacking@discuss.tchncs.de 7 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Prevent subprocess from killing itself until finished.

[–] mako@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 6 months ago
[–] evening_push579@feddit.nu 6 points 6 months ago
[–] mexicancartel@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 6 months ago

modified: index.html

Rip

[–] Beanie@programming.dev 6 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)
At a PV node, do not cut off from any TT hit.

The SPRT result of this may be different than before thanks to LMR.

Bench: 5212899

hey, you did ask

[–] vox@sopuli.xyz 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"render trans chunks after entities/sel box etc "

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago

Very progressive.

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 6 points 6 months ago

“Initial commit, come back later”

[–] Vuraniute@thelemmy.club 6 points 6 months ago

init: add readme

[–] Shizu@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago
[–] Nomecks@lemmy.ca 5 points 6 months ago
[–] victorz@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago (7 children)

I wonder what the last commit message of my career will be.

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] TunaCowboy@lemmy.world 5 points 6 months ago

sq

git commit -m 'sq'
git reset --soft HEAD~
git commit --amend
git push origin +release
load more comments
view more: next ›