[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Of course I have.

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

I was afraid of men long before social media existed based on personal experiences receiving unwanted and inappropriate attention and comments. Note I'm not saying ALL men but this is based on personal experience, nothing to do with social media, what a stretch.

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

I suspect they meant FB, although Facebook feels like tb sometimes lol

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

Very good excerpt! I'll say I want to be gentle with men in these situations for my own safety as well.... don't want to be antagonistic....I agree with you though!

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Good point , for some reason I don't love the term "woman" but I am aware people use female pejoratively probably more often.

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago

Being in line together is different. I'm curious though, if someone is giving you one word answers and seems like you don't wish to continue the conversation do you back off ?

I talk to people in public a lot but if they seem closed off I'll end it

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

In retrospect I think it was the sitting down near me thing, like we were old friends, that made me react more strongly than I would have

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

I would never approach someone who was not looking up at me unless I really had to, like they had dropped something. I can't think of a time a woman has approached me in this way.

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

I know I have watched videos about this also, that people say they are not approached or feel like they can't approach others. My thing is body language and eye contact, if I'm out walking around making eye contact and we exchange a hello and see if more occurs fine. But if someone is totally closed off looking away.... take the hint. And like dear lord don't sit down without being invited to ! Chat a minute and ask first.

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

Thank you for your thoughtful reply! I've worked in some dangerous settings and had to be a bit firmer and these suggestions have been helpful while still being clear!

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 28 points 2 days ago

I appreciate it!

[-] feelings67@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

That's good phrasing, thank you!

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submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by feelings67@lemmy.world to c/nostupidquestions@lemmy.world

I was just sitting at the mall taking a break from mall walking. A man walked over to me when I wasn't even looking up. He said "I haven't seen you here before. " I said I wasn't really here to talk to people and got up and walked away. He said he would leave, he may even have said sorry. I said I was ready to leave anyway. In retrospect I think he may have just been slightly mentally challenged so I wish I had been a little softer, he did not turn out to be aggressive. Looking for suggestions on something still clear and firm but more polite? This scared me for some reason, I think how fast he walked up and sat down near me.

Editing to add a key detail, he sat down close to me which is probably what made me more nervous than I would have otherwise been. I appreciate all the thoughtful feedback I've gotten and interesting discussion.

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feelings67

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