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Republicans Really Wish Trump Hadn’t Picked J.D. Vance
(newrepublic.com)
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this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
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politics
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The sectional predator himself
"I did not have sectional relations with that sofa"
"Sectional" fuckin hell dude 🤣
God damn, couch - that's some hoe shit!
Holy fuck, thank you for that laugh
Again, there is ZERO evidence that JD Vance has reached earth-shattering orgasm in the loving embrace of a two-piece sectional, or that he has had a wild fling or two with wicker outdoor patio furniture. NONE. He certainly has not done so while making disgusting claims about gay people.
This is probably how furries became popular. People saw that Monty Python skit about the mice men and thought it was funny and started dressing up.
Does JD fuck couches? A lot of people are saying it. The best people. They keep saying it so there must be some truth to it. Just the other day I asked him so you prefer leather, right? It's so smooth. It's durable. It's perfect! He looked me dead in the eye and said, "polyester". It's so rough though! That's why he needs the glove!
We need to stop making fun of men wearing eyeliner. Everything else is fair game but no matter how we spin it or couch it in “well they care, it’s just hypocritical, I don’t care!” it’s a very gendered insult that requires mocking men who wear eyeliner. It’s not clever and it punches down.
It's not about mocking someone who wears eyeliner, it's about mocking someone who wears eyeliner and pretends they don't.
I feel like there's only a handful of people in the world who can "punch down" at a US senator currently running for vice president. I don't think any of them are hanging out in Lemmy.
You're a monster. How could you make fun of cargo shorts?
My mom says they make me look handsome and agrees that it's neat that I can carry all the sticks and rocks we find at the park!
That's just anger and jealousy because the fashion industry takes all the pockets from women's clothes so that there will be enough for men's cargo shorts. I mean, I get that, and it doesn't seem fair, but I'm not giving up all the pockets.
All true, but the answer isn't getting rid of cargo shorts
They stop laughing when I pull an entire Chinese dinner for five out of those cargo shorts. Y'all sneak in your candy to the movies. I'll do it my way.
What we should do is praise them for normalizing makeup for men.
👀
Aite objectively funny. I walked right into that one lol
JD "Nothing finer than a sofa recliner" Vance
I’m late to the party. What’s up with all that couch fucking?
You can build a million bridges, but you fuck one single couch, no one calls you a bridge builder.
Made up is just another way to say republikkklown speak.
Lots of people are saying it, and he has not refuted it. We know it's true.
Some really smart and honest guy, this guy, he's smart, and he's really honest, you know, he told me personally ok, me ok, he said that this couch fucker was also a goat fucker. I have to believe it, i was told it, by a really really smart guy
Ok that’s pretty fucking funny. Has anybody already made R34 of that?
You're welcome to go look, I'm certainly not going to.
That's so gross. Which websites though?
Live action bigmouth confirmed, unfortunately.
He prefers the term Furniture Fondler.
I think he's a natural pairing with Donald Trump, the philanderer. They can bring one girl back home without it getting "weird."
Richard Gere's gerbil approved