this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2024
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You're kidding yourself. The norm in American bars is to have two urinals whose porcelain touches, and everyone pees with their buddy while having a boisterous chat.
Or it's a country bar and you have to pee in a common trough.
Ah, the ol' honky tonk urinal that is just a rain gutter hung at an angle with a hose dribbling into the high side.
I do not miss small towns.
The Joe in Detroit still had those. I made sure to use it one last time during the last Red Wings game I went to there. Fun fact, they sold them before demolishing the Joe. I see one went for $55. Man, I could have had a piece of history in my basement.
They are so close. It's actually better to put your arm around the guy next to you to make sure you're good and centered to the urinal.
You must spend a fair amount of time in bars to be so wise. Bars and even restaurants have limited floor space so they can often have just one urinal and you wait your turn. And I have never had anyone even try to talk to me in a bar or restaurant restroom. Why would they? We are there to drink and eat, not discuss philosophy.
People have often tried to strike up conversations in bathrooms when I was clubbing. In their defence, I did look like a drug dealer at the time.
Well that will draw a lot of attention for sure.
You have not peed in enough bars, friend. Once the conversational juices get flowing, people sometimes follow you in to the toilet to keep the conversation going.
Truthfully, I have very seldom hung out in fancy clubs or bars. The places I have hung out in, if you followed someone into the restroom just to talk to them, you would have gotten the shit beat out of you and barred from ever coming back.