this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2023
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Plenty of people do hobbies because they want to do hobbies, not to find someone to date. If you date someone from your hobby group then break up, it can fuck up your hobby group. Same risk if you ask someone out and it's poorly received. Depending on the hobby it's harder to find new people for that than it is to find someone else to date. It's similar to dating someone at work in a lot of ways.
The big benefit to online dating is that people are there because they want to date someone.
That’s not I meant. You don’t specifically go do hobbies to date people, but they are activities where you get to meet new friends.
And as you get to know them better, sometimes feelings are formed, and sometimes the feelings are reciprocated. That’s when you start dating and form a relationship. Even if the feelings aren’t reciprocated, you still have made a friend.
It’s a much more healthy way of forming relationship than trying to meet random people who most likely aren’t compatible with you. This was how most people met their spouses (as shown on the chart in the 1990s) - through friends and as coworkers. You get to know people better if you see and interact with them regularly.
If you think about it, dating people is really just getting to know each other first. So, I don’t understand why dating apps are designed to help with “dating” rather than “making new friends”. It’s much more healthy to use the online spaces to meet new friends rather than to specifically date someone through an app.