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Jesus was a pro-banking, pro-capitalism, pro-rich, pro-slavery asshole based on the parable of the talents in Matthew 25:
14 “For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. 15 To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. 16 He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. 17 So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. 18 But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money. 19 Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. 20 And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here, I have made five talents more.’ 21 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 22 And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here, I have made two talents more.’ 23 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 24 He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, 25 so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here, you have what is yours.’ 26 But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? 27 Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. 28 So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. 29 For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. 30 And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’
I'm not religious anymore and I'm not making a defense of Christianity, but before all of this the Bible explains that when Jesus comes and starts teaching, he's going to teach in parable (metaphor) so most of his teaching needs to be seen through that lens. So this should more properly be seen as a teaching saying to take your gifts (compassion, love, wisdom) out into the world and use them to become a better person. There's also some deeper meaning here that usury was frowned upon at the time so this would have been a very provocative thing to use as a metaphor.
Of course the main way that people corrupt Christianity is by taking things literally, and if you do that you can take any meaning away you want. That's how you get a branch that literally only exists to promote the institution of chattel slavery (Southern Baptist) along with pacifist, community-centric, anti-slavery Quakers. And how people are OK with driving BMWs to church and engaging in the crusades and thinking Trump was sent by God. It's all in there if you want it to be, which makes it easy to exploit.
Oh also if you haven't read The Parable of the Sower and The Parable of the Talents by Octavia Butler, I highly recommend those
I was also trained in the use of exegetical BS to contradict the clear meaning of the text.
The Bible is a Roman imperial project, commissioned by an emperor.
Ah yes, the Romans commissioned "The Bible" as if there aren't 450+ versions in print in English alone with wide variations of included, excluded and revised content. I'm so glad that you personally were able to find the clear meaning of the text in a book that has entirely passed through 3-5 languages and been through a 2000 year whirlwind of competing theological and political forces. Shut it down everyone, this guy solved it
A hit dog howls
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/analogy
And he was racist.