Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Rainbow Railroad // A non-profit international humans rights organization helping at risk LGBTQ+ people relocate to safety.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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Firstly, thank you for being proactively supportive of your new club member!
As said already, most trans folks don't want any special treatment or attention - we just want to be treated like any other person of the gender we're serving up to the world.
So if a woman joined your club, you wouldn't say "Hey, it looks like you're a woman! The womens' changing room is over there." That would be weird and awkward. Instead, you'd probably just say "The changing rooms are over there" and let the person figure out which room to use on their own. So do that. :)
In general, we're pretty resilient people and can manage ourselves. The most help you can offer is using your magical cis-people powers to keep the people who hate us off our backs.
You are correct to imagine that many trans folks will feel unsure of whether they would be welcome in a given gendered changing room. We never know when we are going to run into an obnoxious crazy person who is ready to make our day more difficult.
One thing that you could do (if you have any sway the with the club's management or operations), is find ways to broadcast the establishment's acceptance of gender-diverse folks. Lots of places like putting up pride flags or pride stickers in the shop window for this, but that isn't always possible. More-so than putting up tacky flags, what I really really like is when businesses use signs like these around their gendered spaces:
In my opinion, this is the best way to signal to everybody "Hey, you might see a trans person in here. The management knows and is cool with it. Don't be an asshole." These signs rule. When I see these signs, my blood pressure goes down a few points. It's how I know I'm among allies.
Before I became involved with the clubs happenings I just trained there, I remember there being some discussion about signing a rainbow agreement (an initiative by the municipalty iirc). One parent of a kid was really against that and that parents kid is still one of the athletes here (theyre performing pretty well too so...). Dont really know the ins and outs but the other staff doesnt wanna step people on their toes (they are anti discrimination of any kind tho so its like they try to keep a certain balance). So i dont think I can get something like that to pass the board