I was literally about to quit this week. I don't hate my job. But it's nothing special, just another fumbling company run by greedy owners trying to make a buck off the backs of others. So kind of standard. I'm so very, very, burnt out. It's been very difficult to get up and go do bullshit every day but, y'know, homelessness.

I've got undeveloped property I've been trying to get to for a while now. It's in the middle of nowhere but I want to put a storage unit on it and camper and live off grid for as long as I can. I'm only about to be 50 soon so still got a few years left (hopefully) but I've got health issues and can't keep doing what I have been for work. At least not full time, so I have to get creative.

And I have nothing left to stay for in the state I am in anymore. I could go now but keep putting it off. I've just been paying off debt and killing time.

Anyway, long story short. Manager texted me 'I hear you're trying to leave me' and I swear I thought he was talking about me quitting, since I had been pretty open about my plans with coworkers. Thankfully I replied with something neutral instead of blabbing out right. Little while later one of the owners called to offer a position recently vacated.

It wasn't a surprise, the guy leaving recommended me to the position and I indicated I was interested. Didn't hear anything else about it and kind of forgot about it.

I get to be my own boss, more or less, do more of the work I like and got a raise.

At some point earlier in my life I would have been ecstatic. But I'm so ready for this chapter to be over that I don't even care. I mean, it's nice, I'm a little optimistic about it but in the spot where gratitude should be there is only emptiness. Feels like this is a reflection of the general state of things. With me. The world.

Guess I will hold off the move until spring.

Thanks for reading my rambling. I haven't told anyone else.